Reset You Account Password

The email address associated with your account.

Why Sign Up?

Full Confession Control

Update/Edit or Delete your confessions.

Notifications

Opt-in to receive notification emails on responses to your Confessions.

Advertising

Want to Advertise with us? Get started by creating an account.

Daughters in Law... don’t suffer in silence!

If you are looking for a place to find support, seek advice, laugh a bit, and maybe resolve your mother-in-law issues, look no further!
At Mother-in-Law Hell you can swap MIL stories, give & get advice, and so much more. Join the Daughters-in-Law Sisterhood!
Include an Image?

Your First Name is optional. You can Upload an image if you wish. HTML not allowed & will be saved as plain text.
Confession Moderation is Off. Profanity Filter is On.

Hi I am the mother law and helped my son and daughter move in with us helped them out they got their driver license help with buying a car she hung out with me then she got pregnant she was sick all the time then they where at the hospital my rule in my house is no sodas in your bedroom I new they had some in their room and they did about 12 half fill soda can and candy wrapper in the trash so I took the cans and through them away they came home from the hospital she let me hold the baby then they went to their room I guess she was she mad that I did that they got in a fight and now I have to ask my son to bring the baby down so I can see him now my son has got back to work she dose not come out of room not she will not eat dinner with just to use the restroom all this over trash I feel disrepected in my house I let u in my house and now treated like this

Hi I am the mother law and helped my son and daughter move in with us helped them out they got their driver license help with buying a car she hung out with me then she got pregnant she was sick all the time then they where at the hospital my rule in my house is no sodas in your bedroom I new they had some in their room and they did about 12 half fill soda can and candy wrapper in the trash so I took the cans and through them away they came home from the hospital she let me hold the baby then they went to their room I guess she was she mad that I did that they got in a fight and now I have to ask my son to bring the baby down so I can see him now my son has got back to work she dose not come out of room not she will not eat dinner with just to use the restroom all this over trash I feel disrepected in my house I let u in my house and now treated like this

AHHH my MIL is driving me NUTS! My BILs both make over 6 figures no joke and she still buys them groceries! Us? over here not as nearly as well off as they are get nothing unless its expired. no I mean literally that's what she decides to just drop off at our house un announced on our front porch. Plus she pays for all of their vehicle expenses I mean EVERYTHING even schedules their Dr appointments (both BILs are over the age of 25) :(

I cannot get over my MIL. I just need to let it OUT! We've been married for almost 4 years now and my tongue is bleeding because of how much I bite it! I have really been trying my best to be positive and not read into things and be the better person but in order to do that I just have to get it all out. My MIL has three kids all boys my husband being the oldest. She puts us last in EVERYTHING. We have one child and one on the way. She never asks us when we would like to do get together for holidays etc. They don't give us more than 10 min notice to do family suppers. She expects us to go above and beyond for the other boys (the middle one has one child as well) to watch our niece but our child gets shoved behind. Example... Our son is under the age of 3 and she volunteered to watch him on a day she didn't have to work so we said yes and we would like it to be an all day thing so we could clean and get things done before the new baby which is due in a few months. She agreed. Well this morning came and we called, texted, and even stopped by her house to drop off our child and she didn't answer, and was not home. She didn't answer until the afternoon and said she decided that she needed to go out of town for an oil change and wanted to mow first (112 heat index) and then she requested we watch our niece until about midnight Saturday night so she and everyone else can stay late at a wedding for people she barley knows. Now she said going to be able to watch him until 1 so we gritted our teeth and accepted. well it is now almost 3 and still no more updates, no help no nothing after we made plans to be productive. This is not the first time. The other times (yes multiple) we asked if she could watch our child after I was done working so we could go have a mini date night and she agreed which really was just needing 3 hours or so to have a meal and time to reconnect so we went to a restaurant which was about 30 min away. Both times during our meal like 15 min she calls and requests that we come get our child so she can go to town to watch the other grandchild but we would have to be there ASAP because they wanted to go out drinking. I feel like she just favors this other child and its sad because our niece is a sweet girl and I don't want to associate anything negative because of someone else. She agreed to our request first so I don't understand it. It doesn't make sense to me that you would put one child over another when on top of it I'm super pregnant and my husband just had surgery and so I have to take care of him as well then add all that on and expect us to bend over backwards but no respect or consideration in return. *UGH

I cannot get over my MIL. I just need to let it OUT! We've been married for almost 4 years now and my tongue is bleeding because of how much I bite it! I have really been trying my best to be positive and not read into things and be the better person but in order to do that I just have to get it all out. My MIL has three kids all boys my husband being the oldest. She puts us last in EVERYTHING. We have one child and one on the way. She never asks us when we would like to do get together for holidays etc. They don't give us more than 10 min notice to do family suppers. She expects us to go above and beyond for the other boys (the middle one has one child as well) to watch our niece but our child gets shoved behind. Example... Our son is under the age of 3 and she volunteered to watch him on a day she didn't have to work so we said yes and we would like it to be an all day thing so we could clean and get things done before the new baby which is due in a few months. She agreed. Well this morning came and we called, texted, and even stopped by her house to drop off our child and she didn't answer, and was not home. She didn't answer until the afternoon and said she decided that she needed to go out of town for an oil change and wanted to mow first (112 heat index) and then she requested we watch our niece until about midnight Saturday night so she and everyone else can stay late at a wedding for people she barley knows. Now she said going to be able to watch him until 1 so we gritted our teeth and accepted. well it is now almost 3 and still no more updates, no help no nothing after we made plans to be productive. This is not the first time. The other times (yes multiple) we asked if she could watch our child after I was done working so we could go have a mini date night and she agreed which really was just needing 3 hours or so to have a meal and time to reconnect so we went to a restaurant which was about 30 min away. Both times during our meal like 15 min she calls and requests that we come get our child so she can go to town to watch the other grandchild but we would have to be there ASAP because they wanted to go out drinking. I feel like she just favors this other child and its sad because our niece is a sweet girl and I don't want to associate anything negative because of someone else. She agreed to our request first so I don't understand it. It doesn't make sense to me that you would put one child over another when on top of it I'm super pregnant and my husband just had surgery and so I have to take care of him as well then add all that on and expect us to bend over backwards but no respect or consideration in return. *UGH

When I first met my (now) MIL, she said to my husband that she didn't like me from the start because... I talk too posh and went to university.
...that's a first!

Me and my husband had a deal with the MIL, we worked for the family business and paid cheaper rent for it.
She knew I had an indoor rabbit and didn't disapprove of it when I first moved in.
After an argument, she said that the rabbit had to go or I did.
More arguments came and we moved out, she then got a dog!
Because dogs never smell...

Only one confession? I've got a thousand! But the worst one has to be when she called up my workplace trying to get me fired. I work as a Chaplain and she told my Director that I was pregnant (not yet married) and had mental health issues so I shouldn't be working. All this just to stop us from getting married. For to say, she didn't get an invite to the wedding!

My boyfriend finally passed all his test and he gets to graduate high school in August. To celebrate his mother decided to take the whole family out to lunch! Guess who isn't apart of the family? Me and our son

My Mother in Law is the worst and I am not even married yet ! This lady has lied on me and mistreated my children! My fiancé walks on egg shells around her! It's gotten so bad to the point where she has dragged other members of her family into the situation. To top it off she calls my fiancé and bad mouths me on a regular basis! I'm starting to hate her !

So my SIL... She gets gets everything handed to her on a silver platter. She's only had a handful of jobs and has gotten fired from all of them in just a short period of working there. I had the same job for 3 years and worked for everything I have. We both just had babies 3 weeks apart. Everyone is so accepting and supportive of her being a stay at home mom but everyone in her family puts me down for it, saying I have a family to support and I shouldn't be mooching off my boyfriend. They treat my son like the black sheep of the family and constantly praise her daughter and rub it in my face that she had a girl and I didn't. Well she's only 7 weeks post partum and had unprotected sex. She's freaking out about possibly getting pregnant again being so fertile and not being able to handle two babies. Honestly I'm so petty I hope she is pregnant

So my mil is normally ok. We live with them as we are saving for a house. Fil hates (and I mean: hates and goes on long winded tangents) about not being picky with food and you absolutely should not ever throw anything away much less make a different meal for anyone.
I've taken over the cooking because mil "works" as does everyone else, I'm a sahm. I prepare meals that can be cooked whilst I deal with my sons bedtime routine so that once he is asleep, we can eat.
Fil has now decided he is not eating anything I make (for no actual reason he just turns his nose up at every suggestion) and instead is demanding I make him something different every night. If I refuse mil makes it, leaving me with loads of washing up....
Today was the clincher. I bought fils favourite meal, prepared it and was about to start cooking it, when mil rings and says "8pm is too late for dinner. We need to eat before that." And instead she went to the supermarket and returned with processed fish fingers, processed peas and smiley faces!! (I was cooking a chicken with vegetables and boiled new potatoes)
Well it's not 7:30pm and so far no food has materialised from the kitchen. I think mil expects me to cook it for her, but I'm continuing with my original recipe. After all, if 8pm is too late to eat, she and fil should have sorted themselves out sooner, right?

My MIl has done more than her fair share. Latest topped the cake and my husband still speaks to her as if nothing's wrong just won't let her keep the kids again. Here it is:

We let our kids stay with her for 3 days (one full day) bc we were getting away for the weekend. One of my toddlers (unable to communicate well at the time bc of age) took abt an 8ft free fall off of something. MIL did not tell us or take her to the doctor. On Sunday my DD cried when I Picked her up so I took her to the Dr. Bc she was obviously in pain. My MIL then tells me a lie on what happened to my child(dr said no way she's telling the truth). Dr got CPS involved so we could find out real story (which was that she fell & It took 2 weeks to pry that out of her) ... meanwhile child had cracked skull (no bleeding on the brain though) broken collar bone, and busted ear drum from fall. We checked on the kids all weekend and she never told us anything. She didn't even act normal abt it bc she is sooo crazy!!! I come from a very normal family who would have rushed to the ER if my child were to have even fell off the bed, unfortunately my husband doesn't. Thoughts, on how you would have reacted in my position!? Please!

My MIL is scheduling a photoshoot for just my boyfriend her and my son.... I guess I'm not apart of the family I made

One more confession. My MIL is close with my husband's ex-wife. MIL goes shopping with her and they talk on the phone and exchange christmas presents. I didn't care - I thought my husband should be the upset one. I noticed though that the last time we were over MIL still has their wedding picture out... OK... And come to find out she has been pushing my husband to reconcile with ex. Now I'm mad. She has never said these things in front of me but now I get why I'm never getting asked to/invited to do anything with her. I've never done anything but be nice to her - that's about to end!

My MIL has moments... Most of the time she is fine but she can be pretty heartless/thoughtless sometimes. I have kids from a prior relationship. When I married her son, MIL and FIL told my kids to call them grandma and grandpa. I thought that was great. Fast forward a year and now it's made clear on almost every occasion that they are not 'grandkids'. We had a get together and there was one picture with everyone and then a second picture... without me and my kids. I avoid MIL house for Christmas because my kids are not treated the same and I would hate to have them see it. On one occasion there was even a facebook post about how she loved her [number] of grandchildren and that number was the exact number of grandkids minus my kids... I have asked my husband to say something but he won't. It's one thing to be a jerk to me but it's another to do these hurtful things to children. The kids just love MIL and FIL, they are too young to see it yet. I don't want to say something and make it worse. Ugh.

Everything is a damn competition with my SIL. Our babies are 3 weeks apart and she thinks her daughter is so much better than my son. She get everything handed to her and doesn't have to work for anything. It's so irritating that everyone treats her like royalty. Her daughter isn't even cute

My MIL is fake and phony!! She makes me want to vomit! Before I was married I use to be so close to my boyfriend's mother. I just knew that I wouldn't have a problem getting along with my MIL once I was married, but ooooh how I was fooled. This chick wants to be bestie's with my husband's baby momma, lying and causing confusion. It's to the point that I NEVER call her!!! I mean NEVER!!! Not for nothing! Not even a hello!! I am so not interested. Anything she can do to try and undermine me, that's just what she does and then comes grinning and smiling like everything is good. I can't deal with this creep!!!

Well, my MIL is trying some hoovering techniques with DH to try to suck him back into the fold by doing some love-bombing, doing a few "generous" things, and then daring to keep spreading well-wishes for MY holiday (4th of July - I'm an American, they are not and are very xenophobic about Americans). We're well aware that they hate me and everything I stand for, so to keep wishing us a happy 4th smacks of not only insincerity, but also shows how fake this whole thing is. DH is allowing it because it's easier than having a face-to-face confrontation with them (and we're moving 2,000 miles away from them in January...good riddance, f'ers!). He reckons we can do a full and total cut-off at that point. Well, I'm not waiting that long, so I've already gone NC with them and haven't spoken to any of them since MIL showed up unannounced last month (don't worry, DH made it clear to her afterwards that she'd be wise not to do that again).

Anyway, just chuckling at how obvious they're being with this whole hoovering thing. I was worried that it might be confusing DH, so I asked him his thoughts and he said "Oh, don't worry - I don't suddenly feel that everything is rainbows and sunshine. I don't forget all their sins of the past, and won't be forgetting just because they buy us a few things or inquire about a holiday they know only means something to YOU." They seem to always discount how intelligent this man is. I guess I also made the same mistake, because he seemed happy to accept the money they sent his way.

The funny thing is, I'd rather accept NOTHING from them, because I think it is dishonest to accept things from people whom I have zero respect for and who have zero respect for me in return. I feel that's a more honest way to live. It cuts out any game-playing on my part, right? Those people love to think of me as some kind of b!t@#, when in reality they just don't like how honest I am. If only they realized that DH is actually far worse than I am, when you think about it. Here he is accepting money and gifts from them when in reality he's lost all respect for them and is basically just taking what he can get.

Don't worry, I am not proud of DH for that attitude, but what can I do? His parents have been emotionally abusive to us for YEARS. I've been showing my anger towards them openly....I guess I can't fault him for how he's choosing to display his utter disdain and loss of respect for these people. I'll just be glad when the move happens.... 2,000 miles still won't be far enough away for my happiness, but it'll be a good start.

My MIL is literally the fakest person I have ever met

Hi

My husband and I are Jr. High sweethearts, both of us just turned 30. I've had issues with my MIL pretty much since day one. Whenever my boyfriend at the time didn't want to talk to his family he would shut his phone off, his parents would call my phone yelling at me and cussing at me. His mom told me I was not welcome in her home so I never went over. I never yelled back at them and always tried to be respectful to his family. I started putting on weight and at the time I didn't know it was because I was getting sick and my boyfriend's family thought it was their job to make me feel bad about it. I found out last year that I have several chronic illnesses and that I'll be sick for the rest of my life, his family hasn't been nice about it and are constantly trying to force me to have a risky surgery. I've been telling them no for the last 6 months and finally the poo hit the fan last month when I told them all off on Facebook because they're unreasonable in person. Anyway the trouble with my MIL got worse when my boyfriend and I got engaged. I paid for everything and at first my boyfriend said I could plan our wedding however I wanted and his mom talked to him and didn't like my plans and made me change from a destination wedding to a wedding in our town. His sister started cyber bullying me and I had to block her and stopped talking to her in person. The more my boyfriend talked to his mom about our wedding the more expensive it got for me. My future monster in law told me I had to do this wedding how she wanted even though she wasn't helping, I wanted to cancel the wedding and I probably should have. He kept adding groomsmen and by him doing that I had to add more bridesmaids and his groomsmen backed out at the last minute because they wanted to get their tuxedos from a different store that looked nothing like the ones we picked out. I ran out of money for "our" wedding and I had to ask my aunt for help she completely took over and started telling me it was her wedding now and could do whatever she wanted. 6 months prior my grandma passed away and with my aunt and MIL and boyfriend planning our wedding was causing me to breakout in hives and I started having panic attacks. I thought it would help me if I let my MIL do the bridal shower, I thought she would get off my back it worked until the shower was over. She started buying random junk without asking me and just expected me to use it at the reception, I told her I got all the decorations but she just kept buying random junk that didn't go with anything. At the reception my aunt changed the things I paid the dj to do and my husband wouldn't let me go out and fix it and his mom put the random things out onto the tables. My SIL wouldn't let me dance with my husband every time we wanted to dance she would push me out of the way, I was so pissed and I got drunk because I couldn't enjoy "our" day.

On our first anniversary we went out of state for 4 days and my monster in law was calling me every 5 minutes trying to control every part of our trip, I had to shut my phone off. She doesn't want me to be happy and when we got got back from our trip my MIL and FIL had the nerve to start demanding I have a child (throwing temper tantrums). Every time I went over his father would greet me with "when are you having kids?" He would get to the point where he was almost always yelling at me about every time he saw me.

A few weeks ago they crossed my last straw line and I cut them completely out of my life I can't handle the stress from my illnesses and their bs.

Where to begin... From the beginning I thought the world of my mil. We were inseparable, shopping together, me bringing her to her appointments, going out for lunch,an staying with my husband and I 3/7 days per week due to the long commute between her house and ours. I bend over backwards for her, I am very generous with $, time, and purchasing whatever she needs. Well, its been 15 years and I just experienced a traumatic shock. I caught my mil stealing from me. I caught her going through my cupboards and taking whatever suited her and stuffing my items into her bags during one of her recent visits. When she left her bags unattended, I opened all her bags. I found some of my bracelets, linens, spices, trash bags, and food in her personal bags, tied into small bundles. Let me also say that she and both my husband's family and my family were all together celebrating a special occasion. I just completed a major renovation in our home to add more bedrooms to accommodate all of the family so no one needed to stay in a hotel/motel. Let me also say that this visit was the first time she was very rude to me and some of the guests. I am compeletly shocked because we have always had a good relationship. Why did she do this? I told my husband and he didn't appear shocked. He said she probably thought we wouldn't notice anything missing. What? Then my husband isn't surprised yet he insists shes not a thief. I reply, " yes, her stealing from our home makes your mother a thief. Now I don't trust her. This situation needs to be addressed before shes allowed back into our home." My husband says he will, but I doubt it. The worst part is that this could not be the first time shes done this, I just happen to catch her after all this time. My idea of her has changed, I no longer trust her, and I am angry. Ive never told her no when she has asked me for anything, She does not have dementia so that is ruled out. WTH?

My husbands mother is profoundly lonely and profoundly unhappy woman, that was her official diagnosis from the doctors. When I met her, it was apparent that my husband already had a wife in his mother, as she was unhappy with her husband she substituted her son and they lived an emotionally incestuous relationship as husband and wife for many years. Well there is good reason that she is profoundly lonely, and I get that that stems from her profound unhappiness.

So WW3 broke out when I stole her son from her and her life since the day that we got together has been nothing but attempt after attempt to break up our marriage and win her son back. We argue about her constantly and the emotionally incestuous marriage between her and my husband has been rekindled since her husband died. Not as strong as it once was but now marred with this "could be her last day" bit, which we have been going through since 2008.

Right now she is in the final stages of her life, I have no idea how much time she has left but about every few months she goes into the hospital for organ failure, so I think the end could be near but then she amazes us with what she survives so who knows. My husband is dealing with this by pampering her. I know these times are self created, she stops taking her medicine at around a grandchild's birthday in order to steal the child's thunder by trying to make herself the center of attention, we get the call with the shaky quivering voice every time usually right on the grandchild's birthday, how can each time be this coincidental?

Each time she goes in, all I can do is pray that this is the last time, but low and behold each and every time the horrific old woman comes out as good as new, usually in about three days. The hardest part if I were to be honest is all the energy that we have to expend saving her when she pulls these stunts and we have to, if we don't we could be in trouble, so we do everything we can to help. Take her to the hospital, my husband is even her prescription delivery boy now just to show that we have done all we can to try and coerce her into taking her stupid medicine, he goes over each and every day to take care of this horrific creature and I can't say a darn thing about it, just bite my tongue and pray for peace from her. My prayers go unanswered each and every time. It is as if she is supernaturally protected by Satan himself.

The best way I can explain it is imagine having cancer, but having to keep the cancer going, the cancer must be protected and you must do everything you can if the cancer is about to go into remission to bring it back, so you take the cancer to the cancer emergency where the staff works hard to save the cancer and in three days the cancer is back as strong as ever and you get to suffer more. You really wish the cancer would go away as it is causing extreme pain but the laws protect the cancer, you have to instead prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you did all you could to keep it going, and pamper it too.



These stories really point out how many of us have MILs that have narcissistic personality disorder. My MIL refuses to attend graduations and birthdays of her grandchildren because she won't be the center of attention. She wants my husband to come live with her and complains that she let him go to college. She refuses to eat any food that I cook and will go into her room and eat candy instead. She has complete meltdowns when she comes to visit and demands to go home early. The best news is that after 25 years of marriage I no longer care what she thinks and I refuse to let her visit when I am home. When my husband says that her last visit "wasn't that bad" I pull up the email he sent me with all the details of her ridiculous hateful behavior. I used to think that she behaved like a two year old but after having raised two boys who never acted like the spoiled brat that she morphs into, I have zero tolerance for her ridiculousness. I am now older than she was when I married her son, so I no longer accept the argument that she is old. She actually tells my husband that we need to go to church when she is the most un-Christian like bitch imaginable who has no respect for our marriage. If I treated people the way she does I would not expect to have anyone in my life, so why should I cater to her? Stay calm, say no and stick up for yourself.

I'm glad to see this site back up!

So, here's my latest....

Due to all the poor behaviors of the ILs (and ya'll will appreciate that I couldn't possibly go over all of them over the past year since it would mean writing a book), I've finally come to the point of ushering in NC. Right now we're at LC. We're moving 2,000 miles away from them in 6 months (can't wait!!), and in the meantime trying to navigate the waters of laying down boundaries for when we DO see them - which of course they immediately trample upon. They show their deep disrespect for us at every turn and their complete unwillingness to respect the boundaries we've put in place (simple things, like please give us a 24 hour notice before just popping by and to not say cruel and judgemental things to our kids - I know, right? You shouldn't have to ask such a thing, but with these people unfortunately you do).

Everyone interaction with them is a minor nightmare, which is why I've been avoiding them like the plague. I put a complete block on MIL on FB and the 24 hour notice before popping by is so that I don't have to be home when she pops by. This woman is a real piece of work, and more than I could possibly go into here, but basically she's a covert narcissist (while my FIL is an overt one). Their whole family is one big dysfunctional mess, which means of course that we've suffered quite a bit any time we've had any dealings with them.

I'm not saying I'm a wallflower, but anything I've done or said has been in reaction to their BS. I will NOT just lie down and say nothing, and of course they hate me for that. They hate me for stating the truth, or for putting my foot down and insisting we not be treated that way.

I can't WAIT for our move, and in the meantime, I'm just counting the days and trying to avoid contact with them wherever and whenever I can.

I hope you all are doing well. It's good to have the site back up so we can continue to be a support for one another.

I look forward to her funeral day when all peace will come to me

I look forward to her funeral day when all peace will come to me

My youngest daughter Olivia has deadly food allergies. They are so bad she spent a week in the PICU. With that said, my MIL doesn't believe my daughters allergies are "that serious".
I asked her to read the few pages of information the Drs provided. I was hoping she would get on Olivia's band wagon and help us keep her safe. Instead of reading the information, she tossed it in the garbage and said she has a masters degree (and I don't), that she doesn't need any information...
Moving forward she is told to never feed our daugter anything. Period. Last week she visits and while my back is turned offers my toddler candy. Olivia takes it and breaks out in some hives.
I rush for the medicine while holding back tears and she says "oh come on, it's not that serious".. I yell she's got hives"! She quickly responds "I don't believe you let me see"
I grab my daughter and run into my room. My mil leaves.. Thankfully the candy didn't contain her anaphylactic allergens... Thank God because if it had, my daughter could of died.
After she left I told my husband if that bitch comes with in 50 feet of my daughter, I will kill her .....and I'm not kidding either.

Mother in law who separated my 3.6year old daughter from me.. It's been 4days I spoke to her. My MIL came casually with my SIL and FIL to see my second daughter and had taken away my 1st daughter from me. That day evening when I called to talk to my daughter she hesitated to give phone to her. She was not happy in giving phone to her. She asked me should I really give phone to her??? Obviously she is my daughter and I want to talk to her. But I couldn't say dat to her. I said please give and finally they my daughter phone... I hardly spoke for half a minute.. She grabbed phone and cut it.. After dat didn't talk to my daughter.. Neither I called nor they..
My daughter was all brought up by my parents as I was doing my post graduation. So she is more attached to my parents. Even if she visits my in laws place by night she comes back to my parents.
Eventhough she was wit my parents I never felt she is separated.. Because in 24hours if she is awake for 13hours, I would talk to her or FaceTime for almost 8-9hours.. I would be knowing each and everything what she is doing, with which you she is playing and each and every minute thing... My parents would be updating me all the time and at the night. But my Inlaws never bothered to tel me wat she doing even if I cal.
My in laws didn't like dat.. They coudnt digest that. Obviously they would think their grand daughter should stay with them. But they were not able to Take care of her. I left my daughter with my parents when she was 2months old.. My Inlaws couldn't take dat responsibility of taking care of her at that age. Even I'm not secure enough with them.
Now I gave birth to my second child.. There will be a adjustment period for the 1st child to get adjusted with new born and her own mother. But my Inlaws took away my daughter from me.. She totally got separated and a kind of hatred developed in her in 3days. She didn't talk to me or come near me on the 3rd day of their casual visit to see my second child.
My mother in law Infront of everyone acts as though she cares for me. Mainly Infront of my husband. She brought my 1st child on 3rd day and said u r the mother, u would be feeling bad and u would be wanting to talk to ur daughter so I brought her. Then she should leave her with me and go. But she didn't. Later she spoke I took her because u need rest for ur sake. After 21days of delivery where I'm very much active and I have no problem in looking after my own child she spoke dat. She knows I'm doing my own work and my child's from day3 of delivery.. I went for shopping, to beach with her from day9..
Now comes my husband part. He believes and blindly follows what my FIL and MIL says.. And he says dat it's my mistake to feel that my child is separated from me. I should talk on phone. But who is giving phone to my child.
Even he would think when my daughter was with my parents then y not with his parents. But the difference is when she was with my parents I would know everything about her, talk to her. Now I know nothing about her.
There is a saying in Telugu without MIL DIL is fabulous and excellent in character and without DIL MIL are good at character
I lost my sensitive bond and relationship which I had with my daughter because of her selfishness. I coudnt say a word.
Upon that she also said my SIS had come down so she wanted to be with my daughter. My SIL is also carrying but younger to me. She is happy being with my daughter but on The cost of me losing my daughter. She will understand 1day how it feels. Hopefully she should understand how much I cried and how I spent my sleepless nights thinking of my daughter.
I pRay God to see that day should come to them and they should realise how I suffered that but coudnt say a word or talk back. Even my husband didn't understand me In this aspect

I didn't realise this site was back, I've missed it so much...
Husband and I have been married for 13 years, we have a 3, nearly 4 year old son who is our complete world. We both work and we run 2 businesses. All in all, I think we do very well. For the most part we are happy, there's not enough time to repeat every single thing she's done/said, so I'll cherry pick....
1) Before I'd even met her she started dictating when I could wear my engagement ring-saying I couldn't wear it to my husband's 21st because people would feel awkward that they hadn't brought presents (this was after we had politely declined an engagement party to which she was going to invite just her family and friends, none of my family or any of our friends)
2) She point blank refused to allow us to sleep in the same room in her house until we were married-that's fine, it's her house, her rules....then she allowed brother in law and his girlfriend to sleep in the same room when they stayed over for a good 3 years before they got married
3) She screamed down the phone that my husband was selfish, cold hearted, spiteful and deceptive because she didn't like our wedding date (she also asked him what she done that was so bad that he would want to hurt her like this)
4) When we told her that we wouldn't be raising our son Catholic she burst into tears and started telling us we were making her "desperately sad...desperately sad"
5) When I was pregnant I was very poorly, I was in hospital 3 times and got signed off work at 28 weeks. The only reason I wasn't hospitalised was because I promised I would stay in bed for the rest of the pregnancy...she turns up the day after I'm told all this and tells me we're going cot shopping, when I say I can't she tells me she's going to ring the doctor and tell him not to mess with my mother in law (her exact words "don't mess with your mother in law, you wouldn't mess with her so he shouldn't dare"). When husband intervened she told him "millions of women have babies everyday, this is no different...if I hadn't done it successfully twice you and your brother wouldn't be here"...this is also after we've lost 4 babies.
6) After my son's christening I had to apologise to 6 people for the way she spoke to them
7) Her husband left her when my husband was 13, I'm not defending that, but my husband's 34 and she will still hold the fact that he left over both her sons...the second either of them do something she doesn't like she'll go off about how she raised them by herself and it wasn't her who left them so why are they hurting her like this? He's been married to his mistress longer than he was married to her (he's an <i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i> by the way, an awful father, but for god's sake she's such a martyr to it. I'm sure there are single Mums reading this that have had to raise their children from babies with absolutely no help/money from the sperm donor...he paid every month, the house he left her in is worth over a million quid and her parents are multi millionaires, she was never going to starve and she never had to go without by her own admission)
8) She feels it is her right to say whatever she likes about anything, which is true, but the same goes for the rest of us...if she upsets us then it's her right to have an opinion, if we upset her then we are hurtful and selfish
9)Her friends have started disowning her, her best friend sent her email stating she didn't want anything more to do with her as my mother in law had been so judgemental and nasty about her lifestyle choice that it became to much (her best friend has a younger partner, I think it's something like 20 years difference...however she's about 60 and he's around 40ish, it's not like he's barely legal)...her ex best friend's son is taking holy orders and for some reason my mother in law got invited to some kind of celebration that was being held when he'd finished his studying (this was after the email from her ex best friend), he's now an Anglican priest I think...she kept saying &quot;well, I have to go don't I? I HAVE TO&quot;...everyone (even her mother) kept telling her she didn't have to go, she could just ignore the whole thing...she then announces &quot;I'm going, and yes I will be wearing my crucifix and yes I will be telling people I'm a CATHOLIC&quot;....my suggestion that she not bring it up as the day wasn't about her and it might look like she's trying to cause drama fell on very stoney ground
10) I'm going to court near the end of the year as I reported a family member for historic abuse, apparently my being abused and raped from the age of 3 is exactly the same as her husband having an affair and leaving her, exactly the same....

I could go on, but I obviously don't want to bore you haha x Thank you for reading xx

My MIL is in a league all by herself. She walked out on my FIL out of blue one day, but refused to divorce him for 8 years. My husband has two older sisters and a younger brother. She took the boys with her, and they've never gotten over it. They all idolize their dad, all four of the kids, and with good reason, for the most part the man is the most loving individual on the planet, and would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. He's gone above and beyond for all of us more times than we can count. That's probably what started my MIL's problem in the first place.

Out of her three offspring, my husband is her clear favorite. He is the oldest boy, he is the prince of the whole family. She can't fart crossways without calling him and getting his input on it. He's given her money before, but after we started seeing a pattern we stopped giving her cash. She is one of those people that goes on and on and on all the time.... about NOTHING. She talks non stop no matter where we are and it's always about NOTHING. She'll start a conversation in the middle and expects everyone to keep up with her.

Her relationship with her kids is very strained, stemming from the seperation years. Almost immediatly after she walked out, she accepted the marriage proposal of her high school boyfriend. It's never been confirmed, but I think she probably left FIL with this guy in mind. She openly trashed my FIL and tried her hardest to damage his good reputation in our community, for no reason other than she wanted to come out on top, and in the end it did nothing but hurt her. When I first met my husband, I seriously thought that there was no &quot;mom&quot; in the picture period. I didn't know if she had maybe passed on or if he just didnt see her or what. It was nearly 6 months before I even heard him mention her and before I met her. In her 50's she failed miserably, after her third marriage did the same, at trying to be a country music singer. Nashville wasn't interested in a grandmother. But don't call her a Grandma, that makes her sound old. Never mind the fact that her oldest grandchild is 19 and she is about to have her 5th grandchild.

There have been several instances where she's overstepped. Like the time before our wedding when she wanted to wear a backless, slit up to the hip, plunging neckline, red, sequined party dress to my little church wedding. My husband was mortified and quickly told her it was inappropriate. She then made us wait until two days before our wedding to find a replacement. We were engaged for a year and a half, it's not like she was in a time crunch. There was the time when I was home alone, doing my housewifely chores and without a warning phone call, or a hello, she just walks through the front door like she owns the place. I was in my nightgown, I hadn't brushed my teeth. She hadn't called to ask if I was busy or to say she was stopping by, she just walked in. As soon as she left I called my husband infuriated. He advised that maybe next time she should give me a little heads up before just waltzing in uninvited. There was the time she drug me to my SIL's house for a day at the pool and insisted that her 95 pound 65 year old self wear a string bikini. Not to forget about the time that she stuck her nose in during an argument that my husband and I were having (which was actually a problem caused by her) and told us to kiss and make up, like we were three. I politely told her that it was none of her business and so she should mind her own. Or the time that she invited herself over for dinner, then invited herself to spend the night, then invited herself to clean and rearrange my kitchen to suit her own tastes while I was at work that day. I was livid when I got home (and she was STILL THERE, I was like what? is she moving IN!?) and so I made no bones about loudly changing everything in the kitchen back to the way I had it.

She's been on a roll of selfishness recently. My husband and I are expecting our first child after a long infertility struggle. 3 years of every kind of test you can imagine, at least 72 negative pregnancy tests and a miscarriage later, we have a healthy baby girl on the way. I think that has thrown my MIL's selfish nature into overdrive. Looking back on the past near-decade that I've spent with her oldest son, I'm seeing a pattern develop.

2 years ago, my husband was in an accident playing football at a friends home. His elbow was severely dislocated and we spent most of the night in the emergency room 2 hours from home. Thank God for good friends, they let us stay the rest of the night with them and then made the trip home later that morning. While I was doing damage control, still at the hospital, I called MIL to update her on what was happening. If his elbow hadn't gone back into place manually, they would have to do surgery in a town another two hours away. I made it clear that this was NOT happening, but my MIL heard nothing but surgery and the towns name. So she calls me an hour later, halfway there and asks is we are in the chopper yet. I tell her no and that we aren't going to need the chopper. I explain to her again the situation and tell her that NOW his elbow is back in place and everything is fine. She doesn't like it and hangs up on me. The next day I get my husband home, cleaned up, in fresh pj's and prop his poor banged up arm up on some throw pillows. He is comfortable and he is happy. Until she gets there and starts yanking the pillows out from under his arm. He's screaming that she's hurting him and she keeps saying &quot;I'm your mother, I know what you need.&quot; And she treks back to our bedroom and jerks the sleeping pillows off the bed. He complains non stop that she's hurting him but she won't stop. When she finally sits down, I go and gentle remove the other pillows and put the throw pillows back. When I ask him how that feels he looks at me with the most helpless pitiful look and says &quot;so much better, thanks babe.&quot; There's more to this particular story, and I will share it soon....

The part that has become blatantly obvious about my MIL lately is that she is JEALOUS of our relationship with my Mom. Let me preface this by saying my Mom is all I've got. My Dad passed away 9 years ago from Cancer, my half brother lives 5 hours away and my cousins and I don't speak because I prefer to NOT to be around drug dealers and users... call me crazy. My Mom is such a pleasant person to be around. Her home is a nice peaceful place to be. She goes to church with us, so we see her on Sundays, now that we are expecting she is helping me to get ready for baby girl, and we try to include her in a lot of things because otherwise she simply wouldn't leave the house, she's very lonesome without my Dad. One sunday a month, she cooks a big sunday dinner for us after church and we spend the whole day being lazy at her house, and we love it. We look forward to that sunday dinner all month long because it obviously brings her so much joy to be able to do it for us and because we can check out of the drama for a day, because my Mama ain't got no time for no drama.

And then there is MIL. She works third shift at a factory. She leaves for work at 9pm, gets home at 7am, and sleeps until 6pm Sunday through Friday. She spends her entire Saturdays sleeping. It's impossible to spend any real time with her. It takes her literally hours to &quot;wake up.&quot; She goes through two pots of coffee and a pack of cigarettes before she's awake enough to do anything. She was given the option to take first shift because of her age when she was hired but she insisted she wasn't as breakable as people thought and that third was fine. She'd worked thirds as a temp at a different factory and had gotten so stressed she'd dropped down to 95 pounds and stayed bruised from the shoulders down. She said her body was &quot;used to thirds&quot; so she didn't want to disrupt it's natural schedule. So it is impossible to coordinate a time to be with her because she's either sleeping, or still waking up (I'm telling ya it's a process) or gone to work.

I've tried in the past to give her the benefit of the doubt. She's flighty, ok, fine, it's a personality quirk. But as the years go on and I become more settled in the family, things become much more clear to me. My MIL is SELFISH. And she always wants to be the center of the universe to her kids. She hurt them by leaving their Dad, she alienated them and kept them at arms length for years and years and now suddenly she's hurt because they don't want much to do with her. And now she's so green eyed jealous of the good relationship my husband has with my mother. Looking back I can see that it's been brewing for a long time. Since the elbow accident. The morning I got him home, I was overwhelmed. I needed backup. My Mom and I are a great team. When I called her from the hospital she dropped everything, drove the ten minutes to our house, shut everything down in case we were going to be gone for longer than a night, packed a little suitcase for us for that just in case, picked up our dog and made sure everything was ready for us whenever we got to come home. When we finally did get home, he was in agony and needed his pain killers that we hadn't been able to get filled. So I called my Mom. She brought back the dog, took the RX's and got them filled for us and then brought us home lunch cause she knew we were probably starving. After we got him settled in, I called my in laws to let each of them know we were home and he was fine. My MIL lives 5 minutes in the opposite direction as my Mom. Barely 5 minutes had passed after I got off the phone with her when I see her car crash into my driveway on two wheels and come to a complete stop in my yard at my front door. She jumps out barely dressed and comes banging on the door shouting for us to let her in. My Mom answers the door and just as soon as MIL sees her she freaks. She starts shouting &quot;THAT'S MY KID! MY KID! LET ME IN THAT IS MY SON IN THERE!&quot; Very possessive, almost as if she felt like my Mom being there was taking away from the fact that she was my husbands mother. I explained to her that Mama was here to help ME out and not because my husband had specifically asked for her, but I'm pretty sure it all went in one ear and out the other. I chalked that experience up to trauma and let it go. I have no time to dwell on drama, I've got enough going on in my life that i have to deal with.

When we found out in March that we were expecting a baby girl, we were over the moon thrilled. We'd wanted this baby for so so long, and to know that our little miracle was a girl was all the more exciting. So we decided to do a little gender reveal party, just for our family, just to make it special and fun. We found out late on a friday afternoon and knew we couldn't keep the secret for very long, so we decided to throw a party together the next day at my Mom's house. She has a new house, on an acre and a half of land, she's always kept a spotless house and loves to entertain. Plus she has a better parking situation of 15 people than we do at our house. So it was a pretty easy choice to have it there. We planned it for 4pm. That would allow the family (his family, again, I have none to speak of) time during the morning and early afternoon to do whatever they had to do, it would still be daylight so that we could take some cute photos and so it was settled. We started calling people and they all said ok, 4pm works great. My MIL was so excited she could barely stand it over the phone. So the next morning at 9:30, she calls my Mom. She asks about the &quot;food situation.&quot; We live in the South, any &quot;get together&quot; requires food. My hubby and I decided to get Little Ceasars Pizza, it's quick, inexpensive and tasty and would please a large crowd. And that was it. My Mom suggested my MIL maybe bring ice and soft drinks or dessert maybe. MIL insisted she bring sandwich stuff so that we could have a &quot;sandwich making station.&quot; Ok. Fine. If she's paying, bring it on. She says she will hop in the shower, get ready and go get the stuff and be at the house by 4. We get to my Mom's around 3 and get everything set up. Family starts trickling in around 3:30.... but at 4:30 there is still no sign of my MIL. My sisters in law are getting antsy, my FIL is used to this and my husband is getting angry. So he calls her to find out where she is. To our horror, she has not showered, not gotten ready, not gone to the store and is currently putting together a piece of furniture for her bathroom and says she has one more to go. &quot;Time must have gotten away from me.&quot; She tries to cover. My husband calls her bluff. &quot;From 9:30 to 4:30?!&quot; He tells her to forget the sandwich stuff, the pizza is enough. He doesn't care what she looks like she needs to brush her teeth and get over to my Mom's so that we can get the party started, we obviously can't start without her. She doesn't come rolling in, slowly, until 15 minutes till 6pm. She went to the store anyway, bought $100 worth of stuff that no one ate and had even gone to a different store to get a bag full of baby essentials for us as a &quot;smooth it over&quot; gift. We didn't even let her get inside the house, we drug her to the back yard and opened the box with the pink balloons in it immediately. She absolutely ruined that party for us, and she did it, I believe, on purpose, because it wasn't about HER.

That was when it occoured to me how much the center of attention she has to be at all times. She knew. Without a shadow of a doubt she knew she had somewhere to be at 4pm, and chose to dilly dally and put together a piece of furniture instead of doing what she needed to do.

It came to a head this past weekend.

We had just gotten out of Church on Sunday afternoon. We like going out to eat on Sunday's as a family because it's the only time we all are ever together long enough to do it. My Mom goes to church with us and being that she is my only family she is always invited to come along. Apparently my MIL and husband had talked that morning and he asked her if she wanted to come along with us that afternoon. She turned him down, but said she wanted to see him (not any of the other kids, just him, mind you) so he said he'd come spend the afternoon w her afterwards. But on our way home from the restaurant my cell phone rings and it's her. I hand the phone to my husband cause I don't want to talk to her. When he answers I can hear her screaming on the other end of the line. Apparently she changed her mind and wanted to come, but she'd never let my husband know, so we went without her. She was hostile, and when she found out that my Mom had gone with us, she got even more upset. She basically demanded that he come pick her up and take her out somewhere to eat. Even though we'd just stuffed ourselves she told him he was going to go eat with her. She said &quot;you can eat again.&quot; He told her no. That he was full and he didn't want to go eat and that he didn't want to sit in the little local diner and watch her eat. He'd rather be someplace where he could rest. He offered to pick up a to go order for her and bring it to her house. But she wouldn't hear of it. He finally told her no, if she wanted him to pay for her food she'd take it the way he gave it. She started in then that she never got to see her kids. Hubby reminded her that it was her choice to work thirds and to basically not have a life. He finally got frustrated with her and hung up. I decided to skip the &quot;fun&quot; at her house and instead went to my Mom's where I could sit in peace and enjoy a sunday. But he's forgotten his cell phone, and he has to have it in case I need him for anything. So instead of immedaitely going to my Mom's, I pack up the dog and go to my MIL's house, praying she isn't there when I get there. But she is. So I pull up in the driveway, honk the horn, get my husbands attention and give him his phone. I can tell he's mad, so I put the car in reverse and start to back out. That's when MIL runs out the back door waving her arms and screaming for me to come inside. I politely tell her I have somewhere else to be, and I've got the dog with me and I need to get gas etc etc, so maybe some other time. She won't hear of it. She basically comes and drags me out of the car and into her house. I didn't realize it until that day, but I think my MIL is trying to copy my house. I recently took my house from dark pottery colored walls to white/grey walls. I painted all my black picture frames on my gallery wall white and painted my kitchen cabinets white and the base of my coffee and end tables white to lighten everything up. She is doing the exact same thing, and she didn't start until after I did mine. I guess imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, but a MIL copying the DIL? Does that seem weird to you? It does me. Her kitchen table has a white base now, her walls are white now, every picture frame on her walls is white now. She is splashing aqua blue around everywhere just like I've done. It makes me uncomfortable, because I'm wondering the motivation behind it. Anyway, I go in, take a 30 second look around, fake a smile, tell her its all so cute, and then apologize again and say I really have to get a move on, Mom is waiting for me I should have already been there.

Later that night after we both get home, my husband tells me that his mom expressed to him how she thinks it is UNFAIR the amount of time we spend with the other parents as opposed to the time we spend with her. And I say &quot;WE&quot; as in my husband and me in particular, not the three other adult kids she has. Just us. It isn't UNFAIR because we do all we can to include her in our day to day, but she won't let us. We invited her out three weeks ago to have dinner with us and she refused, saying she couldn't get ready in time. 5 hours later when we stopped by her house she had barely gotten out of the shower when she answered the back door. She just didn't want to go because we were taking out my Mom and my MIL's mom that same trip. I go out of my way to invite her over for supper and she will always refuse saying she'd rather not come at all as opposed to coming and then having to get up and leave for work. So, she decreed that from now on, the third Saturday of the month is HER day. (My Mom's day is the third SUNDAY of the month.) She gets to be first. She said &quot;I can't cook for you like [my mom] does.&quot; She can, she just won't. As if cooking would be the only reason we would come see her.

It occoured to me then, that all these years she has been pea green with envy over the good relationship my husband has with my Mom. She is jealous now because she knows that this baby will have more to do with my Mom than with her. She is jealous because I don't need her for anything. IDK what she expects? Am I supposed to say sorry Mom, you can't help me pick out baby clothes every because my MIL wants to be the one to do that? Who am I gonna call in the middle of the night when my baby won't stop screaming and I'm at my whits end? MY MOM, that's who. Cause she is MY MOTHER. In reality my MIL and I are complete polar opposites in spite of our similarities. She is jealous because she isn't the kind of mother anyone would ever be proud to have, and my Mom is. I hate to sound like &quot;My Mom is better than His Mom,&quot; but what kind of woman walks out on her kids and then expects them to not resent her for it? What kind of Mom insists that when she broke up the family, nothing was different? She claimed her boys never even knew there was a divorce happening, that they didn't see a difference at all, and when my husband called her bs on that, she wouldn't have it. She got so mad she could have spit fire, but my husband stood his ground. Everything was different and she can lie to herself all she wants to but it IS ALL HER FAULT. Whatever reasons her kids have to not want to be around her are HER FAULT. She only started trying to be a Mom again a few years ago. All of a sudden everything she was doing was for her kids. Buying a house she to this day struggles to afford was for her kids. None of her kids NEED a house, we all own our own homes. She can't be told she is wrong about anything, even when she outright LIES about things and we catch her in her own web, she claims we are wrong. She tells a story about something I said during our wedding and it's a flat out LIE, and I have the whole thing on video to prove its a lie, and I've shown it to her and she keeps telling the same lie! What kind of Mother is JEALOUS of the relationship her son has with his mother in law. A GUILTY mother. That's who... one who KNOWS she screwed up a sure thing, one who knows she scarred her children far more deeply than she could ever even imagine. One who tries too hard to be the example of a perfect mother and fails miserably every time. That's who. And she is that woman.

My MIL calls me a &quot;bully&quot; and is demanding that my husband &quot;stand up for himself&quot;....ummm, let the record show that she's the one who wants to be in control of things and that SHE is the one who is a bully and that SHE is and was a terrible mother.

EVIDENCE
1) She's mad that WE ( my husband and I) decided to cut off her access to a credit card that she opened in HIS name because we were saving for a house
2) She had the audacity to ask us to take care of her dog while she went out of town the week that I was due to have our daughter...but now you want to act like you're the greatest grandma in the world? Girl, bye.
3) The reason she's calling me a bully is because WE (my husband and I) decided to tell her to stop posting a million pictures of our daughter on Facebook (side note: What 50+ year old woman lives on Facebook anyway?)
4) She's three-times divorced and so she has no one to love her and is clinging on to her son
5) She flat out said that she didn't want to be a grandmother in the first place

For these and many other reasons, I refuse to let her keep our daughter for any length of time at her house.
Check and mate.

My mother in law is a sociopath, she would rather see me her daughter in law dead than share her gormless <i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i> mummies boy with anyone. we were not even married when she cracked the shits about my then fiancé telling her that &quot;No there would not be a legal document that I was not aware of giving her and her husband equal guardianship of my yet unborn children with me their mother, when my husband said no to this she threw the mother of all tantrums, banging (Too cunning to break stuff) and screaming and telling my husband to go to hell, his dad then sat me down alone and explained to me that if anything came between my intended and his mother that would just be the end. what a complete tosser. the histrionics continued for 6 long years before I said to my husband its over I'm not going to fight for you. seriously I had to sit and listen to my stupid mil complaining about children playing footy on the road and that could bring down a power line and in turn a small child might pick up that live power line and get electrocuted. The man who had promised to love honor and cherish me let me sit there and put up with this <i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i>, like &quot;OH yeah that really is feasible&quot; she rang up the council about dogs pooping on her nature strip and threatened how would they like it if she did the same and all the while dysfunctional hubby is saying &quot;Yes Moms right&quot; when I said to someone I absolutely hate that bitch hubby said &quot;OH come on that's a bit strong isn't it&quot; She threatened to steal my son from kindergarten. Goddamn I hate her. She said what a whore I was, I was scared to answer the phone for many years because I just couldn't handle her being on the other end telling how badly I sucked. When my second child was born she said &quot;Oh the first one doesn't miss you at all, He's got his Grandma and I'm his security&quot; When my mum was dying of cancer she told me not to be so selfish as to be sad about my mom and that much worse things had happened to her, in other words &quot;do not expect sympathy because you have not gone through anywhere near the trauma that I have&quot; The pressure on the unwanted in-law is so immense. one day I was leaving her house and I just could not take it anymore and I saw a truck I was supposed to give way to and I thought I've had enough and as I went to pull out on the truck my children started talking in the back seat. that evil cow had nearly caused the death of her grandchildren too. She exists to hate, she has also taken so much money from me and husband that has set us back so far as she just trolls along, even with all the money she owes me and hubby, she expected me and hubby to pay for her husbands funeral, no way, she has never given us a cent in our whole married life, she takes and takes and never gives we were so far out the back door before we stopped talking to her. Being a sociopath she can manipulate so incredibly, however her lies are so outside the bounds of reason only stupid people take her seriously. this horrid witch wanted to ruin my life and all I ever wanted was to live in peace without the emotional blackmail. She constantly threatened if someone had upset her that she would kill herself, well 15 years later after deciding to have nothing to do with her she is alive and well, probably shitting some other poor bugger off. she is just plain evil.

Got a great one: MIL sends my husband a birthday card yesterday that says &quot;find your own path in life that makes you happy. Just be 100% you- you don't have to fit into any certain pattern in life&quot;. Are you FREAKING kidding me?!...

I am at my whits end. My MIL as gone to one exstream to another. Before compleatly controlibg to not doing a damn thing. Eaither way is stressful, and I fell like she is never going to leave. My hubby and I have changed out move out data twice to acomadate her needs. There are issues with SSC (she is permitily disabeld) and her ex is holding up the last bit of it. I have hit a point where I don't care, my stress is too high iv'e gain 30lbs and have zero felling of ownership over my own damn house. 90% of everything in the house is her's. The stress leve has gotten so bad about how she will be on her own the my hubby is cosidering a loan, giving her money every month and co sighing an appartment. Witch is all fine and danddy but I get this gut felling that, that would just enabel her and she'd be back with use after the loan was spent. My husbant is also worried about how she will pay for you med's when she is on her own. This topic I am hartless about for she had the oppritunity the sue the company that casued her to be permitaly disability, has it documented and everything, could of had her medical taken care of for life with a setalment on top of that and chose not to! She chose to barily affored for her Dr's and med's. This literily infuriates me becuase it is effecting my husbant and I life together. She was supose to move out Dec 2015. Around that time she brought up going back to work part time at home (great) this was the same time I was looking for a second job and she brought up me doing the work she was going to do (and she'd be the one being payed) she never looked into it further than talking about it. I get she is disabeled but whollowing in her misery, complaining about money, and waiting for handout will not fix anything. I wish she would get a job just to help her self out. I am to the point where I want to take a trip and let them work it out, but I know that's not the answer.

So it appears SIL is contacting me as a flying monkey...again. I have no idea what exactly she thinks she wants or what she thinks to gain. She lost her opportunity to be ACTUAL friends with me years ago when she betrayed my trust and spread things I told her in private to the family. Silly girl - do I look stupid? You only get the opportunity to fool me once.

Open Letter To My IL's... (and thank you to the rest of you for allowing me to just vent this here)...

Did either of you honestly think that we would want to rent your run-down, insect ridden, stone-age-internet (in that particular borough) rental property that YOU own just to save $100 a month? There is no price that can be placed on the piece of mind that comes from telling you 'No Thanks, I think we'll avoid dealing with you even more deeply, opening up even more opportunities for arguments and discomfort not to mention allowing you all open access to our living space'.

You cannot even look me directly in the eyes and barely have 4 words for me (in-between saying passive-aggressive comments and jabs about myself, my children, and my husband). Why would I want to rent from someone who loathes the very air I breathe? Does that even make sense to anyone?? Oh, wait, I forgot: you didn't want your rental property to continue to stay empty, and in your heart-of-hearts (or whatever it is you call that dark pit in your chest) you know we are clean and responsible (I'm sure you'd never say any of that outloud, however, as that goes against the narrative you enjoy telling yourselves and anyone in the extended family who will listen to you.)

Congratulations, that offer caused DH and I to argue for a good 30 minutes (until we reminded ourselves how stupid it is that we allow ourselves to argue over such pathetic people). For a moment there, you reduced my husband right back to that little 7 y.o. boy who was afraid of making his mummy and daddy upset. Just like always, I had to be the one to remind my DH that he is, in fact, a grown man. I had to remind him that taking a sub-par apartment along with having more of a stressful connection to his family was a terrible, terrible idea...one that we couldn't just sweep under the rug because mummy and daddy want their rental property filled. We aren't responsible for their rental success.

I am still dealing with the fact that DH is too afraid of you two to make the simple request of a 24 hour notice before you drive 1.5 hours to our city to visit. I know of at least 3 occassions where you had to make those plans ahead of time as you had other obligations in the city....so, you know, try a little courtesy where we are concerned and do not think you can just pop by whenever you want. It causes me to scramble to get out of the house before you arrive (because I am trying to go 80% NC, which means bdays and holidays only, honey). If you don't learn the courtesy of 24 hr notice, you'll discover my children also not here as well when you arrive. Don't believe me? Try me. Learn some courtesy. If my DH is too scared to make it more clear to you, I'm happy to do so in a much less tactful way than he would manage.

Lastly, my final thoughts for today include thumbing my nose at you another moment. After being literally ignored at Easter and my kids only receiving about 4 words from their grandfather, you have the nerve to ask if I want you to purchase us all tickets to a live children's event. Ummmm, no. Oh, don't get me wrong...I plan to go with the kids - without you. Oh, don't worry, I made sure to purchase tickets for the session that only had 4 tickets left.

If you want to spend (supervised) time with my kids - you'll learn to do it with the courtesy of a 24 hour notice and in a manner that ensures I don't have to look at your pinchy face and see your grumpy husband glaring at me from across the room. If you cannot figure out how to do that, you'll find your access to my children much more restricted.

What....you thought that seeing my daughter with mosquito welts all up and down her legs was something OK to ignore? You thought it was OK to throw your heads back and howl when I had my DH ask you politely to keep screen windows and doors closed so that my daughter (and I) didn't keep waking up in the morning covered in mosquito bites (and risking snakes slithering into the house as well)? Then you thought it was OK that your youngest son called my autistic daughter 'retarded' and then joked openly at the dinner table about her speech issues? Oh, and when that upset me, *I* was the bad guy?

You thought it was OK to tell my 6 yo daughter that she had gotten 'fat' in the 2 weeks since you last saw her (which was total BS as she's a very tiny girl, but even if she had gained some weight, it wouldn't be your place to point it out to her)??

So, let me get this straight - you refused to protect (or even care about the safety and mental/physical well-being of) your grandchildren (who you proclaim to love), and then think you can have access to them whenever you want? You're lucky I even let you anywhere near them. Just because my DH is too afraid of you to stand up to you more often, *I* am not. You've got only a couple of years to enjoy our proximity before we move thousands of miles away from you again. Don't think I won't give you the international symbol for 'hello' from 20,000 feet in the air as we leave.

You poked the mama bear one to many times, and now you'll reap the karma of all of that.

MIL has 3 sons and I snagged the eldest; her golden haired boy. FIL is a mine worker so he is away from home quite a lot. She is desperate to hold on to her &quot;baby boys&quot; and was devistated that one got away. So much devistated that she relocated the whole family 6000kms when we moved for work so she was still I close to her son. They moved into the next street, 250m from door to door.
Sons and number 2 and 3 don't (and have never) worked, don't drive, have never moved out of home or contributed to society in any way. They are 27 and 30.
Now all of this is not really my issue, the problem arises for me when MIL opens her mouth. She tells my children that she is taking them to breakfast/ movies/ festivals etc without consulting me then just cancels at the last moment for no apparent reason! Then she constantly compares my daughter to deadbeat son #2, even suggesting that people would think she was his daughter not my partners!
Why did I say partner not husband? Because she is made such a fuss about our idea of a wedding that we scrapped the plan all together. I told my partner that I wasn't interested in sharing a last name with her anyway. We would elope but I think my parents deserve to be there to see their only daughter marry, and I can't tell my partner his parents on the afforded the same privilege. So everyone misses out.

'Can you BELIEVE what she said about us??' squeals my SIL like a little 5 year old on the kindergarten playground trying to impress people with her gossipy war-mongering. Honey, anyone with half a brain could believe it. I mean, can you honestly act surprised that after the horrible treatment we've received for well over a decade that, strangely, someone might have something to say about it?

Unlike my miserable in-laws, I don't go around spreading gossip to people in the 'real world' (as it were). I did once make a comment to someone on FB, but it was not someone I actually have ever met in real life, and it was not someone who has any connection to my in-laws in any way. You see, I have more class than to air our family dirty laundry to anyone we mutually know...unlike them. They've ruined every potential relationship within the family (as well as to our extended 'family') by telling everyone lies about me, my husband and my beautiful (and innocent) children. Now we have ZERO chance of any kind of real connection with anyone in the greater family circle thanks to the smear campaign against us. I do have a secret for my in-laws though....psssst, lean in closer.......I could care less about that entire group of ignorant xenophobes. I'm very happy without them - I just like letting ya'll know the lengths at which my in-laws will go to try to bring us down. Strangely, it's no big loss to move here and discover they had already laid the ground work to ensure we never connect with anyone in their circle. It's OK, honey, we are fully capable of making our own friends - you know, folks with open minds, who enjoy intellectual pursuits, and who are happy, encouraging and supportive. Oh, sorry, I shouldn't use such large, strange vocabulary words since my in-laws clearly have no idea what they mean.

When I wrote recently about how things went down on Easter Saturday, I forgot a few details (because, I mean seriously, it would take a very long time to rattle off every single ridiculous slight, icy glance or rude behavior or else I'd be here all day). One interesting tidbit was when we exited the restaurant (and I'd like to point out my in-laws left while my youngest and I were using the restroom - I mean, why wait patiently and politely for us when it's far more fun to have us come out of the restroom to discover they've all left without us?). My husband waited for us (because somehow he has some idea about other people's feelings - clearly he learned that from being a bookworm and hiding himself in his room much of his teen years, since he definitely didn't learn that from any of these wretched people).

So, my husband, my youngest and I exited the building to find them all waiting in the parking lot. I was walking ahead (my husband was helping my youngest along) and I saw my MIL standing there holding a couple of bags and looking at us, clearly the international symbol that she had something to give to us. So, naturally, I headed her way. She said to me 'Oh no!! You go over there!', motioning for me to go to our car. I'm like 'O....K......' (but didn't actually say that, because I have manners and stuff, and instead smiled and did as I was commanded). Instead, she waited for my husband to get to her and gave the bags to HIM, explaining they were for the kids for Easter Sunday (the following day).

My FIL had already looked off and was getting into his car, so I did the same (hollering out a 'thank you again for dinner' in a very friendly, chipper voice before getting into our car). After we got home, I made no bones about explaining to my husband that that little display was for HIS benefit. It was so he would be sure to notice their 'generosity', since he's the one they hope to impress with these little things....you know, to try to convince him to forget the horrible things they do since they once-in-the-bluest-of-moons will do something generous for our kids. He stopped in his tracks and thought about that...and golly, I had a point. Why not give the bag to ME, since I was the first one out of the restaurant (from our little group) and the first one to reach her. Why purposely send me away and focus only on HIM seeing the bag and having her explain the items within (you know, to get full credit, naturally).

Come on, folks....that was a pretty overt and ridiculous act....overt enough even for my blind-to-his-family's-BS husband to notice. Tsk, tsk...too obvious, honey.

What was in the bag? Chocolates that weren't kept cool and therefore melted in our tropical heat, and 2 mugs for the kids - one of which the handle had broken off of. Thanks? I ended up throwing away the melted, warped chocolate and my daughter tossed her mug when she saw it didn't have a handle like her brother's. Brilliant. So, she pushed me aside to make a big display for my husband about giving us 'treats' for the kids that they couldn't fully enjoy. Oh, but they 'mean well', you'll say. Yeah, maybe. And maybe they only put about 2 seconds of thought into things (because chocolate inside a hot car all day is going to melt...and since I made a special mention of getting together in the AFTERNOON so that our egg hunt wouldn't include melted eggs, you'd think it would have been on their minds to keep their own chocolate in good shape with...oh, I dunno, maybe that ice-filled cooler that had drinks in it could have also housed a bag of chocolates. Oh, sorry, that would give too much credit for the ability to think ahead about something that benefitted someone else and not themselves and their 'reputation'.

Brilliant, folks. Meanwhile, the clock is ticking closer to our departure date...I will literally never set foot in this region again. If one of them dies, I'll offer to watch the kids so they don't have to deal with the BS that I KNOW would come if I showed up at a funeral for any one of these spankheads. I'll be sad for my husband for losing a parent - but you know what? He's already lost them. He's already shut them off, thanks to their stupid behaviors. I sit there being the pillar of grace and friendliness while they shoot me icy glares along with the ridiculous 'bag of treats' episode in the parking lot. Tallies are being added up, folks (for the last 12 years, really), and I hate to tell you this, but you're only shooting yourselves more and more in the foot.

Can anyone believe the stuff I dare to say about these wretched people? I'd like to think that if you, too, have had to deal with such miserable people for over a decade, that you have also earned the right to blow off steam to a bunch of strangers (although I DO still consider this a sisterhood!). Thanks for reading all the way to the end. I know ya'll understand my feelings. Tomorrow is another day, where I'm focusing on my kids and my amazing (if a little blind to his family) husband. Life goes on...

I don't know how long it's been since I've posted here, so maybe I'll give a recap and update in one. We moved to another country, in great part, to be closer to my in-laws. For years I enjoyed only having to see them once a year for a few weeks when they would visit us, but here I am in their country, reeling from being terrorized and tormented during the three-and-a-half months we spent living under their roof when we first arrived.

I foolishly thought they'd be happy we moved here, as I always assumed that one of the reasons they always hated me was because their son moved across the planet to be with me. It turns out they are just miserable people (which, granted, I did figure that part out long ago) and are he!! bent on blaming me for every hind-quarters itch they might suffer from. In essence, they never gave me a chance and rejected me out-of-hand from the beginning, and I've spent the last 12 years dealing with passive-aggressiveness as well as out-right aggressiveness from them. My SIL and BIL are also active players in this fun little game of &quot;Let's crap on Cat&quot;.

Well, we live an hour-and-a-half away, but clearly that's still not far enough as I still have to see them every few weeks (although I have been sitting it out more and more regularly, going about 80% No Contact since I'll make an exception for holidays and birthdays).

So, I just spent a &quot;lovely&quot; afternoon with these fine folk at a local park (it was a neutral place where we could have the kids do an egg hunt). I scheduled it for Saturday because I didn't want them to rain on our enjoyment of the actual day. My FIL showed up with his usual stick in his hind quarters, giving us the silent treatment (when he wasn't busy shooting icy glares my way or just getting up and walking off on some random walk around the neighborhood instead of spending quality time hunting for eggs with his grandchildren). My MIL was fairly stand-off-ish and my aunt-in-law (AIL) felt the need to make dumb comments about the fact that my autistic daughter gets nervous if we hop into a car without a good destination. She gets anxious, and apparently my AIL simply couldn't wrap her mind around this fact (this came up because my AIL kept asking if I had managed to see every single site in the city in the 6 short months I've lived in this country. Umm, no, not yet. Sorry, but we've been busy, and it's a pretty big city! Give us a break! She criticized me for not just aimlessly wandering around the city till I knew it like the back of my hand. I explained that's not practical with an autistic child who likes to know exactly where we are going and who gets overstimulated if you try to squeeze too many activities into one day. That seemed to boggle my AIL. Maybe she should study up on autism? Who knows. Anyway...

Then from the park we went to a local Chinese place for dinner, where my FIL continued to give us the silent treatment (Oh, but he spent exactly 60 seconds ticking my daughter, so, you know, all should be forgiven, right?). This is the same man who has still not come to see our new apartment, doesn't call or txt his son AT ALL to see how his job search has been going, how the kids are doing, etc. For the record, I'm not personally complaining that this miserable, wretched man doesn't visit. I just find it interesting that these people claim to have so much love and interest in their grandkids and in their son. They did nothing but talk about me behind my back for YEARS about how I somehow must have put a gun up to their son's head to get him to move to my country to marry me, and naturally I also ruined his life because he chose a college degree and a job that interested HIM, and not the one his parents wanted for him. It's all my fault for telling my husband to follow his heart. God, what a horrible wife I am.

Anyway, so that about catches us up. Oh, I forgot to mention that we've decided to move out of the area as soon as is comfortably possible. My husband is working on ensuring a relocation (hopefully several thousands of miles away) with his employer in a couple of years, and then we'll leave and never look back on this town (except possibly at Christmas). This experiment of living closer to them clearly failed, so we'll just focus on some of our other goals for moving here and make those happen (ie. career and travel goals).

I have a silly suggestion. I assume a mother in law is more likely to be a nightmare due to boredom, especially if they are without a man. Give her some spice, make it nice ;) plenty of grumpy old men out there wandering like lost sheep without their lady. Play matchmaker, remember to be nice. This must be an act to melt their ice and bring them blinding bliss forever so you are free. Be sure to photograph and film each precious moment possible, that will keep the love birds on low chirp mode. And better to be safe than sorry, don't let them wander off without a chaperone,especially driving! They might drink at dinner then forget they did. Oh my the possibilities. We can't help it if we are concerned, loving daughters in law. It is our duty to protect our husband's mother and grandmother to your children. Of course we do really love them...its just how female relationships are when hierarchy is challenged. She's heartbroken her baby no longer needs her, replaced by us. All those years she just barges on position to take over. Take control slowly, but not with desire for power. Do so as a woman to be there for your husband when his mother no longer is. One day you will be the mother in law too. The phases life have been trying on us women through time. Only we can back each other up and be a true helping hand for another woman in distress. Lets face it, men just look at us for food, sex, laundry, secreterial duties, child rearing and nursing. Nice guys are just so because they must do so to compensate for something they feel they lack. I hope I am wrong. All I am certain of is a woman on your side is pure gold. Deny a man fallacio expect a lawsuit for anything they can set you up for. I don't know what happened but men are very emotionally sensitive yet socially restricted to express their troubles. We are all in a bell jar. The best we can do is raise our sons to know they are not lone rangers in this mad world. Just because one girl hurt them, does not mean the next will intend to. Likely that first did not as well. I doubt boys are told this. They are mommas boys for reason. They need us women. But they need to develop a new outlook to adjust to the rapidly changing socital norms. Hang in there my fellow sisters. We can straighten this out if we commit to it with patience, expanded perspective and understanding. We are the rock that keeps the household standing.

Love and support,
NJ

I live with my MiL and I cant stand it! She keeps giving me unwanted advice about what to feed my baby. She gets mad when I tell her I don't feel comfortable giving a 4 month old oranges. And she keeps walking through my room even though I closed my bedroom door. There is absolutely no privacy for me.

I live with my MiL and I cant stand it! She keeps giving me unwanted advice about what to feed my baby. She gets mad when I tell her I don't feel comfortable giving a 4 month old oranges. And she keeps walking through my room even though I closed my bedroom door. There is absolutely no privacy for me.

My mother in law (who refuses to call me her son's wife even after seven years) came to my home, sat on my sofa, held my five month old son, and informed my husband that he must not be the baby's father because neither of us have blue eyes.

I don't know where to begin so i'm gust going to start. My MLI does not like to eat real food. By that I mean she only eats anything that is convenient. Ramen, crakers, lunch meats, chesses thing that requier little effort on her part. Becuase of this a while ago we got into a fight that resulted in her not talking to my hubby or I and buying her own food (for once) witch it was great. She was staying out of our way and I did not have to worry about trying to please her.
Before this she always complained that I didn't cook enough or what she wanted, but when I did she was not hungry or didn't want it and would just let the food rot.
Now she is interacting with my hubby and dtarted her old habbits. I have a lot of food alergies and can only have some things in the snake relm. I have to buy blokes of cheese becuase I cant have the pre shreaded kind. The addative to keep it from clumping makes me vary sick. Not even a full week after buying groceries almost the entirer block of chesses is gone with half of the other. In a week!!! Not even over a long time just ugh. Ive gotten to a point where everything she does pisses me off. Just seeing her boils my blood along with her voice. I fell like she will never leave! When ever we bring up she cryes and turns into a mess and then we cant talk. Im just so done and don't know what to do.

I don't know where to begin so i'm gust going to start. My MLI does not like to eat real food. By that I mean she only eats anything that is convenient. Ramen, crakers, lunch meats, chesses thing that requier little effort on her part. Becuase of this a while ago we got into a fight that resulted in her not talking to my hubby or I and buying her own food (for once) witch it was great. She was staying out of our way and I did not have to worry about trying to please her.
Before this she always complained that I didn't cook enough or what she wanted, but when I did she was not hungry or didn't want it and would just let the food rot.
Now she is interacting with my hubby and dtarted her old habbits. I have a lot of food alergies and can only have some things in the snake relm. I have to buy blokes of cheese becuase I cant have the pre shreaded kind. The addative to keep it from clumping makes me vary sick. Not even a full week after buying groceries almost the entirer block of chesses is gone with half of the other. In a week!!! Not even over a long time just ugh. Ive gotten to a point where everything she does pisses me off. Just seeing her boils my blood along with her voice. I fell like she will never leave! When ever we bring up she cryes and turns into a mess and then we cant talk. Im just so done and don't know what to do.

Ha says upload image I wish mil never wants to take a picture of me but she flash her iPhone in my face I wasn't ready lol I saw the pic she took l of me I look not so great she did that on purpose I'm only 30 she is 70 she always trying to compete with me when it comes to looks I love inner beauty she loves buying things no judging just wish her negative attitude would change!

Ha says upload image I wish mil never wants to take a picture of me but she flash her iPhone in my face I wasn't ready lol I saw the pic she took l of me I look not so great she did that on purpose I'm only 30 she is 70 she always trying to compete with me when it comes to looks I love inner beauty she loves buying things no judging just wish her negative attitude would change!

My story is years old - the biggest issue is we finally set some boundaries and my sneaky mil tries to break them. We've gotten the boundaries of space, invitations, questioning, etc in order, and she now must only contact my husband. A therapist suggested this and at first , I refused until my mom accused me of deleting an email. She's the same woman who felt it was fine to send an email to me and copy my husband at his work address! She thought I was hiding emails- sorry mil, I'm not you! My husband told her to no longer send personal emails to his work, but she acted like it was an accident! The copying part was just downright rude! So now, even though we've set it up where she only communicates with my husband, she still sends him texts or invites for me that she knows will get under my skin. I've repeatedly asked my husband that no matter how humorous he thinks these are, I can't find them funny based on my history with this crazy women! Recently, she sent an email for an all day ladies afternoon function through my husband to my teenage daughter and me. The function was on my birthday. Now this woman is good, but if my husband had never told me, I could go on happily. It irritates me so much that I started shaking, and I said,&quot; why, why can't you see what she's trying to do? And you're letting her! You're letting her schemes divide us.&quot; I know it's weird to say an invitation could be rude, but when you're inviting someone to an event on her birthday to which you know the person has no interest and it's also making a statement about how much better you think you are than your dil, it's extremely rude. So the prob is my husband still after many, many years still refuses to see her as scheming, but just as completely clueless when every person I tell this story to sees right through her. It's just never going up change, even with my clarity about what I want and don't want. Right before Thanksgiving, she was so weird and sent me a coupon to a store that I never visit. She also bought my teenage son a bunch of Star Wars apparel that we had to return w/o receipt. He stopped wearing that stuff when he was 10 or younger! Just can't stand her- not looking forward to spending another holiday with her either. I feel like Chrustmas wasn't long enough ago!!!!!!!!!

My MIL has broken the vow of silence after two months due to a power outage. I have been living with her for 8 months now, and thoes two months where the best form the lack of judgment.
My MIL cought me leas then indescent this morning comming back from the bathroom. (My hubby and I gave her the master suit, so out batheroom doir is right next to her bedroom door.) And proced to ask me if I knew wha was going on. I answered polietly and got my hubby to answer the rest, then darted for my robe. (So acwared) She passeve agressivaly requested to talk with my husbant so he did. And dear god oh mighty did the water works start.
(Him and her got into a fight two months ago about her lack of progress of not moving out or getting socisal secrity income fixed. Rightfuly so he has been living with her for two years.)
For a women who seas she hardly ever crys, when ever we or ever he trys to talk to her about anything she does not like she just cries and cries and turns herself into the victomin others eyes.
Her main poites where she can't move out, I don't pull my weight around the house, and she wants a hair cut.
For whatever reason her bringing up she wants a damn hair cut for her new drives licens pictuer (that she let exspier) just infereated me. She's ben complaing about her hair seans I was abel to move in!!! Also the fact that I don't clean or cook enough apparentily. At one point I tryed to do everything how she wanted it and just couldnt, even to the point I felt like a pace of $#!+ and went to bed crying for not living up to her standareds. I just dont don't and can't do that any more.
To make maters worse it looks like we are going to have to forfet out tax return and our move out data into an appartment for her if she can't get her self together, witch she wont because she drages everything out tooth and nail. I just want her out! We need our own spaces to call our own and to get away from this. We are in our early 20's. If we want friends over and make noise we should be abel too, not bending over backwards to please someone who claims she can't do or handel anything.
I did not go into ful detal of what is going on just key points that buged me the most and what is curent.

My struggle with my MIL stems from her own loveless marriage (more like a partnership). My FIL to begin with is a huge struggle- verbally abusive to me and treats my MIL very coldly. He is completely emotionally detached and has some pretty significant mental issues. I would be incredibly remiss if I didn't share that my MIL (perhaps understandably, yet still unfortunately to my hubby and I) attaches herself too closely to my husband in what can only be assumed as an attempt to compensate for the lack of affection / emotional connection with with her jerk of a husband. It's driving my husband and I crazy. She is in constant competition with me, who I guess she sees as the woman who &quot;took&quot; him away? My SIL even struggled with her inability to keep healthy boundaries with my husband from what I believe to be the same compensation for affection due to her emotionally deficient father.

Things just got worse once our daughter was born. Now she's not only fighting still for the role as #1 woman in my husband's life, but suddenly she's an immeasurably better mother than I am!??? My rules for my child are disregarded. Anything I ask of her with regard to my daughter is received with nothing but resentment. One year, my husband innocently gave me a Mothers Day card that said &quot;best Mother ever&quot; and she actually had an issue with the card and legitimately got upset. She texts my husband saying awful things about his wife. We've tried everything with her- I tried talking openly with her and she cannot communicate- only gets defensive. One time, I called her up and I wanted to know what was wrong (genuinely, I did) and instead of being honest with me about her feelings, she just took a low blow and referenced one morning when my daughter was up super early and I was still waking up and actually accused me of not feeding my own child. Amazingly, she and everybody else wonders why we have kept our child away from her! One time I saw a text message to my husband from her actually saying that I was &quot;wicked&quot; and that our daughter &quot;needs&quot; her as if to imply that my husband and I need her amazing assistance?

My husband and I are exhausted. We cannot allow my MIL to see our daughter anymore until she gets some counseling, but she sneers at the idea. There is nothing wrong with counseling. She thinks she is too good for it.

This woman goes to church every Sunday, but behind closed doors is a selfish, manipulative, and judge mental prude. She is so selfish that she is willing to put her grandchild's well-being second to her pride. Case in point, she takes huge issues with any gift (kindle from my parents, Gymborre gym membership, private Christian school) because she's in constant competition not only with me but with my parents as well. She would actively limit my child's education potential because it wasn't a gift from her. My parents may have more money, but she doesn't always have to pout in the corner or (even worse) attempt to limit my child's potential because she can't afford to do the same thing. Side note, my daughter is not even 3 and can count to 12 and knows all of her ABC's. Wanna know how? Through the Kindle that my MIL openly disapproved of on Christmas Day. Will it ever get better? She's a nightmare.

~Our first year~

We are three days away from celebrating our 1st wedding anniversary. Your 1st anniversary is traditionally celebrated with a paper gift. We have lived through a crazy storm orchestrated by his mother, ex and daughters all year. So one of his gift is a roll of toilet paper that has Happy 1st Anniversary printed all over it! You know...to wipe away all the negative crap and focus on the good and love that is our future. lol! I got him another gift too, but couldn't help myself from buying the $15 toilet paper roll. Sometimes it just doesn't matter how much something costs, its just too perfect.

I'm married to my best friend and love of my life. He is a wonderful Christian man with a horrifically dysfunctional family especially my manipulator in law (his mother). I believe the only thing that saved him from being like his family is that he was raised by his Grandparents who were wonderful loving people. We got engaged after dating for a year. This is a second marriage for both of us. I was married previously for 21yrs and him for 15. I had been single for 5yrs when we met and him for 11yrs.

I knew of some of the manipulation and guilt put on him by his Mother but it came into full focus the night we got engaged and this past year. The co-dependent relationship his Mom and Ex have together is off the charts uncalled for. You see the ex lived with his family during their last years of high school having no family of her own. They married right out of high school and had a rocky relationship the whole 15yrs. The were separated more time than they were ever together. His Mother was an alcoholic narcissist who married his Step Dad when he was only 3. He was beaten by his Step Dad until he was big enough to stand up for himself and put it to an end. Fast forward to after his marriage and his Mother works with his ex wife, have for years and years. The whole time he was single his family invited his ex to everything. Some things I understand, they have kids together after all. But to every picking thing ever? He was never able to move forward in his life and everyone he ever dated was treated poorly and run off. After all who would want to put up with all of that the rest of their life? (Insert raised hand) I would, I love him so completely that I will not allow their drama and hate to hurt us. Biggest lesson learned this year is that he needs to stand his ground. Everyone deserves respect and should not allow anything less in their life. Even if family disrespects you, don't let that be ok and turn into the norm in your life.

The whole 1st year we were dating when we were around my MIL you could literally count down the seconds until she mentioned his ex to he and I. His adult daughters do the same. He obviously divorced her, but his Mother sure hadn't. The night we got engaged we rushed back to my families house to tell them the news &amp; called his Mom on speaker phone. After he finished telling her our happy news the next words out of her mouth were &quot;do you really love my son?&quot; You could have heard a pin drop along with everyone's jaw at her rudeness. She contacted me shortly after and asked to meet for lunch &quot;to get to know me better&quot;. We met but instead of getting to know one another I sat through almost three hours of why I shouldn't marry him and how his ex was the love of his life. Um...not according to him. Just saying...

At our wedding rehearsal she was adamant in front of everyone to switch sides with my Mother so she could see her son's face and not mine. That makes a new bride feel all kinds of special, lemme tell ya. My Mother refused bless her heart, loudly proclaiming this is the brides side and I'm not moving an inch. She did offer to pay for my dress and even though I didn't feel comfortable with it my hubby insisted. She did end up paying but drug her feet until I had to scramble days before for alterations. It was a mess and I'm sure intentional. Oh, and of course she added in it was only right because she had also paid for his 1st wife's dress. But of course I wasn't allowed to spend as much as she had given her. Don't you worry, I got the dress I wanted.

This past year of our marriage she's done whatever she could, whenever she could, to disrupt our happiness. The 1st holiday we decided to invite both families to our home was Christmas Eve and she and the whole family refused to come. They insisted that we go to his Sisters house and my family wasn't welcome. Let me add in the past we have gone to his Sisters and if so had only 20min tops to spend as he in law enforcement and was in full uniform just before having to log on each year. It makes for a very stressful rushed holiday. This past year he had to work also but if it was at our house he would have had two and a half hours to spend enjoying family before he had to get into his uniform and leave. They still wouldn't hear of it. We stood our ground and had it at our home with my family and his daughters. She followed that up two weeks later by throwing a fit because we went away for the weekend for our birthdays and didn't have a family dinner. Our birthdays are around Christmas and New Years. After the Christmas Eve fiasco there was no way we were agreeing to dinner.

My MIL also has done everything possible to come between he and I and his adult daughters. That's another long story but she should respect his parenting and not undermine him at every chance she gets. Most recently she sent him a slanderous, evil email against him and targeting me and trying to destroy our marriage. All of what she said was not true, out of context, manipulative and guilt poured out on him all for her to have a better relationship with his daughters and ex. That's the moment I realized how truly hateful and co-dependent she is. I know now she will never change, we can never trust her or expect anything but the bile and evil that spins in her head and heart.

I've come to the conclusion that non of her or his families non-sense matter. The only thing that does matter is our love for each other. They aren't in our daily lives and we can pull off being cordial no problem. We've set our boundaries and will plan a wonderful future and happy peaceful holidays. Some they might be invited to but it's up to them if they walk through the door or not. We limit the time we have to be around her and thankfully so. No one needs that toxicity in their life.

She poke fire

Well I don't really know where to begin.. I'd be here all day explaining the ins and outs of my relationship with my mother in law to be but basically the easiest way to explain is she is a narcissist. If you don't know what this is google it.. She ticks every single box. I have been with my partner for 6 years. We have a two year old daughter. My MIL has always been difficult as she has never been happy that my partner met me and has always tried to compete. She constantly puts me down in front of my partner but in very subtle ways.
Since he was very young she has always been very inappropriate with her son and has always put a lot of guilt on him. He used to have the weight of this all on his shoulders until he became a dad himself and realised he couldn't put up with that and being a father.
Anyway that is a story for another day!
The main issue is she always has to make everything about her and steal the limelight at every turn. The latest one is we are due to get married next June. We have been engaged for 3 years and our wedding has been booked for two years. So now it's on the countdown and our families should be getting involved and excited in our wedding plans.
Now you may be thinking how could she make her sons wedding plans all about her? Well to give you a bit of background about her.. She has been married 3 times. She has never got married for the right reasons. She has now been with her bf for the last 10 years and he has said continuously he doesn't want to get married. We have been there when she has cried to him asking for a ring and why won't he get married. He has been married once before and has been put off the whole idea. Anyway last Christmas guess what she got engaged.
Okay so that may not seem too bad so far.. I knew right away she would have to get married before us so yup she booked it for this August, 10 months before ours. Still not seem too bad? Myself and her had a conversation about what dresses I like. I also told her I liked pale green for the colour scheme.
So... My partner was visiting her the other night and asked her to send a pic of her dress to make sure I don't get the same one.. Her words were 'oh she will get a similar one because she told me that's what she likes'. Now that to me is really out of order. She can get what dress she likes and maybe she liked that style but for me to tell her what I wanted in my dress and her still to go and get a dress she thinks her future daughter in law will wear in her sons first and only wedding 10 months after her is shocking.
Also guess what her colour scheme is? Yip pale green. She has asked our daughter to be a flower girl (Which we are really gutted about because we had always assumed our daughters first time as a flower girl and walking down the aisle would be our wedding but I know that's our own personal problem) and she had also asked her other young granddaughter from my partners sister to be flower girl. She has bought her other granddaughter the younger version of the bridesmaid dress which was £200 but she has told us we will have to buy our daughter the flower girl dress and if we can't spend the £200 we have to buy any dress from a high street shop but in her colour scheme. My partner is furious because she has spent £200 on her other grandchild and won't spend a penny on our daughter. He doesn't want her to be a flower girl now as he feels she isn't being treated fairly.
So to sum up she is managing to ruin all our ideas for our wedding day and it is turning into a nightmare! Help please!

My mother in law is horrific. She is everything I hate in a person. She has never worked, has been in welfare her entire life and never made an honest living. She judges everyone else, including her own brother, saying &quot;He'll always be poor&quot;. HE WORKS! Even if he works 2 or 3 crappy jobs at least he makes an honest living.

She (and my husband) brag how great of a single mother she was. How she spent all her time doing things with him. She actually brought up a spoiled rotten brat, who she couldn't even bring out to family dinners because he was so misbehaved. She even said so herself, but with no shame or regret.

She acts like a homeless person who always EXPECTS everything for free. She abuses coupons - even for small companies who are trying to advertise to create more business. For example, she had a coupon for FREE pizza in the newspaper. She found as many coupons as she could and used them more than once. She didn't even tip the waitress!

She judges ME for being a single mom, but THIS single mom now does your son's laundry and cleans up after him! AND SHE was a single mom! Her excuse (which I don't need an excuse, I'm fine having been a single mom, proud of it actually) is that her husband beat her up. I get that she left, I understand he was a drunk but how can she judge someone for being a single parent when she was a single parent?

She is dirty! Her home is like a big pile of garbage that is cluttered with items from as far back as 40 years. She never buys anything on her own. HER sister in law (her brothers wife) buys, prepares and DELIVERS food to her door. She doesn't pay for it and then she treats her sister in law like garbage. She does NOT act grateful to the sister in law and calls her names behind her back.

She has these old wives tale ideas like - she won't get a flu shot? Like they're bad? She had an infection in her leg and had to go to the doctors every single day for antibiotics through IV because it was so bad. And it's because she is THAT DIRTY!! She won't take care of her health and her legs and feet are HONEST TO GOD the dirtiest, grossest feet I have ever seen. Even the doctors made comments on it.

She wears Depends and she won't change them because she is too cheap. AND SHE GETS THEM FOR FREE FROM HER SISTER IN LAW!! She lives on a pension and it's not like her rent is expensive, she lives in affordable housing by the government. She has no food expenses and her car insurance is paid for by me and my husband.

She has a MAJOR gambling problem on top of it all. We take her to Vegas every year and she gets mad at her son EVERY SINGLE TIME. She talks to him like crap yet she won't let anyone else talk to him - or about him - like that. She tries to run him down to me and wants me to agree? NEVER would I do that.

He's a grown man now, a good man and tries to take care of his mother (who guilts him like she gave us so much for him!) She was a lazy POS her whole life so she gave up nothing! She talks smack about everyone - she literally has no friends. Her reputation at her place of religion is &quot;the crazy lady with rotten teeth who doesn't get along with anyone&quot;. And that is LITERALLY her nick name. So it's not just me.

I was warned about her from SO MANY people when I met my husband. I still have all the patience in the world. I treat her like a queen. I have invited her along on vacation every single year, even when my husband says no. I don't know why I do it because every time, it messes up MY Plans and she fights with me or him - EVERY SINGLE TIME.

And BTW - she has money in the bank. Lots of it. She's just cheap because she is a whack job. She won't pay for anything. I thought it was a farce but after this many years. I realize - she takes the cake in the cheap department! She wont pay for food unless it's a coupon. She will eat buffets and take 5-6 plates full of food. She even sneaks the food out of the place in plastic bags! She will drive 50 miles to get free food. She won't 'share' costs with anyone but EXPECTS everyone else to pay for her.

I told my husband that she can be very generous! But I did not tell him that it's ONLY when she gets something for FREE. She has never spent a PENNY on my husband since we met 5 years ago. He has spent tens of thousands on her. She will give him left over food or drop off used crap we don't need but hasn't even bought him lunch.

She treats me like absolute garbage. I can't even begin to tell you the things she has done or said to me. But the reason for my rant is, we are supposed to go on our annual trip in a few months and I WILL NOT do it again this year. I have had it. Last straw. I don't know how to tell my husband but I have to this time. For my own sanity!

I have tolerated her before and I obviously ONLY do it because I adore my husband but she is literally the MOTHER IN LAW from HELL.

My husband is an only child raised primarily by his grandmother and mother. He never had a relationship with his father. I realized I was not first choice for her son. I was a single mother of 3 at the time we met, and he pursued me for over 2 years.
Page forward, we have been together 10 years and have been married for almost 2. This is a 2nd marriage for both of us, as he was married for 3 years (no children) and I was married for 13 years (3 children). I have single handedly raised wonderful children who have turned into amazingly accomplished adults.
This woman has said the rudest things to me, and I have chosen to ignore her most of the time. She NEVER insults me around my husband. He can't even stand to be around her. She lost her home and we moved her into our first home along with her two roommates. They pay half of what a rental in our area would cost and EVERYTHING is out of pocket for us. She is constantly trying to use the fact of me NOT wanting to be around her and me being mean to her. She cries to my husband about how EVERYONE hates her and she has no one....all lies. She has more friends than I have had in my entire life.
I grew up in foster care and I simply do not want to be around ANYONE who treats me like crap. Life is to short to be around abusive people. She has Munchausens and is constantly injuring herself or lobbying her different doctors for invasive surgeries. She is very manipulative and wants all the attention on her, which is fine with me.....if it weren't for the fact that she uses this to make my very kind and wonderful husband miserable with perceived guilt. I hate to see him unhappy. For this reason, I have NOT once said a mean thing to her, I just ignore her which drives her up the wall apparently.
I feel our lives would be so much better without all her made up drama. I feel if she wanted a relationship with me then she can pick up the phone and make the effort. She is just not my cup of tea and I could care less about a relationship with her. She uses me and my children as an excuse to whine to my husband. Which REALLY upsets me. She lives 4 blocks from our home in a very small town, and it's all I can do to muster up enough mental energy to deal with her during the holidays.
I realize my MIL issues might seem trivial compared to most. I have no family other than my children and husband, you can count my friends on one hand. I like peace and quiet and my ideal day is to spend a day working in my garden. I have little use for people that demand constant attention....I never babied my children and I am not about to begin babying a 67 year old woman....sigh. :/

I have been with my partner near 7 years married 2 and now with a 1 year old daughter. My MIL has been giving me hell since she first met me I was 16 he was 18 I'm not the smartest or prettiest but my husband thinks Iam and I'm okay with that but I hear my MIL whispering all the time about how fat and ugly Iam she never came to visit her son before our daughter was born which I was happy I don't want to fake niceties for her she is a huge gossip and a drama queen if you say no to the slightest thing she make a big deal and tries to guilt trip you into and apology which I used to say sorry but now that my daughter in the picture I have started to put my foot down. But that has just strained my marriage and cause me to get sick she doesn't care about how we want to raise our daughter we tell her this what we are doing and this is what our daughter like but she ignores it and does what she wants she always just says (Quote: I have raised three perfectly good children I think I know what I'm doing) and commenting on non existant house work which Gets done daily and make me paranoid to the extreme.
Sorry this so long but I have never been able to get this off my chest and reading all these stories I felt like I had to share

Love reading this every night... So here I go, I've been with my fiancé for about 17 months. He has a shaky past so that didn't help at all. His ex was a drug addict and when we first got together I was a dancer... Big mistake but we live and we learn. So I of course was compared to the drug addict. Finally she gets to know me and I her.. Let's say FAKE CHRISTIAN. She was so sweet to my face and behind my back sending my man messages like &quot;she's not a woman of God, she's uneducated, ect ect, let God choose your wife&quot;.. Well once again I forgave her and we got on with it. Well he never tells him mother if we fight because if he does it's normally a big one or were about to end it which only happened once, about a week ago it happened again. He calls his mom and says God knows what, about an hour ago I look at his phone text from his mom she says &quot;please let me introduce u to my friends no strings attached... I hope you're ready to come home, I hope you feel the same way I do.&quot; I'm absolutely pissed!! I've done everything for this woman and her son. When will she learn?

I am so glad that I have found this website!!! I have been married for just over three years. My husband and I have been together just over four years. My mother-in-law basically is on a pedestal in everyone's eyes. She has this way of controlling people because no one wants to upset her. It is so hard to explain how horrible she can be to me without even saying much. What makes it worse is I feel like my marriage has been one big competition for my husbands love. I do not want him to not have a relationship with his mother, but is it too much to know that i matter to him? That I come first in his life? She even talks to him and calls him Babe like a wife should. And I am always made out to be the bitch because she cries if I stand up for myself. Sometimes I wonder if my marriage is even worth fighting for if she is going to be at the center not me.... Any advice?

evil mother in law

So my mother in law told my husband to put a protected order against his wife of eight years and he did it.....
So she also told him to kick his wife of eight years out her house and he did it.
luckily the protective order was dismiss with in two weeks because they lied.
all i have to say is karma will get them. I forgive them but will never ever forget.

My mother-in-law has never let anybody use her kitchen even her own husband! I caught my father-in-law frying eggroll outside when while it was raining and there were a lot of mosquitoes. I don't understand and so I asked my husband to ask her why she's not letting anybody use the kitchen, and she said &quot;because it is my kitchen, nobody can use it, only me.&quot; Even her own children cannot cook in the kitchen anytime. One time when her and her husband went to Vietnam for three weeks, she put a foil over the stove top because she said we are not allowed to use anything in the kitchen besides the microwave. It frustrates me but my husband's dad offered to let us stay at this house until we have saved up enough for a house. What should I do? I'm going crazy!

Im so glad I am not a lone in the hell of the mother in law. This is really long and im sorry.
Let me start from the deginning. My husbant and are where best friends growing up. So i've knowen him for a vary long time. Before getting marrieed I took a trip to visited and live with him for just over a month. (He is in the military and got stationed somewhere els) With already seed MIL living in the house. It was no big deal when visiting. Everything ran smothily no problems at all, almost like just having a room mate.
After my trip, he took leave to speend more time with me and flew back home with me. By this time we were engaged and we desided to get married on this trip.
When we moved me out there and got back the distruction started to happen. Fitghting, passive agresseve behavior, yelling, slaming doors, almost anything that makes me uncompfterbol she has done or is doing.
My husbant and I are in our 20's living with a 45year old women with cronic migrans.
Nothing can be down endless it is on her schdual. Anything from watching tv to doing the dishes can start a fight.
The most resent one was over laundry. Getting all histraical saying she didn't know we where doing our laundry sepret and that we should ask to use HER washer and dryer. When all we did was sort the it to prep the laundy and find his dirty uniforms.
The fight three moths before resulted in surety forces and my husbants officers getting involed. The &amp;$*%? military got involed. This resulted in a come to Juses meeting and a time line for her moving out and how to get there. The only problem is every week sens that meeting something always comes up where she can't get her income agusted so she can move out. She Also refuses to talk about her move out data or just tells us &quot;it will be taken care of&quot;.
Orginaly befire I moved out there she was supose to move out after Thanksgiving, but that passed. The military meeting Came to the conclution that March, April time would be the goal data for thats when our lease is up.
My MIL lives rent, water, food, almost any housing exspence free. We even give her money for gas in her car and almost anything els she may need help with. She has no job, won't find one. All her income comes from soscial secrity disability.
He has been living with her for two years and I only six months. But I am at my wits end. I can't leave my room for it makes too much noise. Talking when my husbant is home is a hasel becuase I can't talk at my nornal voice for its too loud and I will be told to be quiet. And forget about being on the phone, not only will it be to noise but she hovers and listens in on ever converstaion. I can't even call my own mother endless im out side of the house. Worst of all whem my husbant brought this to her attention all she had to say is that that is my problem. My problem? That I have to wisper to have a converstion to try and apease someone who makes living at home stressful to now end.
I am a people pleaser, I dont like conflict and prefure to talk thing out. But when some won't talk and just gives us dirty looks walks off and slams doors.
The longer my MIL is here the less communication my husbant and I have. It has but so much strain on our relationship i don't know what to do any more.

I have a rather long story, as my husband and I been together for ten years and married for one. MIL was never accepting of me since the very beginning. Her personality is known to be abrasive, narcissistic, manipulative, and aggressive to not just me, but the rest of the extended family as well. Unfortunately FIL is also narcissistic, but likely won't have the time I write that all here.
A little about me: I'm a nurse. I am introverted, passive, and maybe easily labeled as being timid/meek, which I am trying to work on.

When we first met, I was invited over for a dinner with their immediate family, MIL appeared pleasant. However, behind my back she told my bf at the time that I have little going on for me. I was just turning 18. She told him that I don't have attractive physical traits and that he can do much better. FIL agreed. At the time, I will come over to their place to have dinner once a week. After roughly a month, MIL walked up to me and said, 'You are not the brightest or prettiest, so you need to work harder in life than everyone else to fit in with this family. Why is it that I don't see you cooking or mopping the floor if you have the chance?' Naive me, stood there in shock, I nodded my head, went in the washroom to wipe the tears that came running down my face uncontrollably. She stood outside the washroom saying, 'You look even uglier crying. Useless and worthless, as crying is all you know.'

A few years of continued abuse went on, however I enrolled into nursing school, and saw MIL less. Unfortunately being constantly reminded how ugly I am by MIL made it hard for me to accept compliments by friends or other guys on my appearance. To make things hard, communication in my relationship wasn't the greatest. He never defended me or protected me. I fell into what I thought was depression, which lead to eating disorders that made me drop down to just 80lbs. It was a definite struggle to get through, but I am happy to report I overcame that.

Once while being over at MIL's, because she calls me over to babysit SIL's two little ones. MIL pulled me aside and said, 'You know I always try to protect you. I have noticed recently that my son leaves the house at 2am and isn't back until the morning. And I heard him talking to another woman. She has the prettiest voice. I'm not surprised though, I know my son best, so I knew he'll cheat.' Of course, I knew it was a lie. At the time, my bf and I will some times fall asleep talking on the phone, so I will hear him snoring.

After I finished nursing school, my husband and I got engaged. MIL came up to me the day after my husband purposed and said, 'What a pretty ring. I picked it, so thank me. You know I was always against you marrying my son, but he always ignores my wishes. Lets live together comfortably.' She desperately wanted us to live with her. Husband and I both just stated our careers, so we are still saving up for a place. It doesn't help that were we are from, a decent house costs 1.3 million.

While planning our wedding, she wanted to be involved with every part. She wanted us to ask for her approval when it comes to photography, venues, date, and even down to the dresses I choose to wear. She even demanded to see photos of dresses I picked out for my mother. I soon realized why. MIL even held a mini fashion show of her wearing her dresses in front of FIL and my husband. She proudly exclaimed, 'I am lucky to have such a slim body, unlike your mom's. If they held a beauty pageant for women above 40, I will surely win. I am even better looking than some pitiful looking 27 year old women.' She smirked and smugly looked at my direction. By that time, I have desensitized to most of her antics and rude remarks. Despite not having the wedding of my dream at the venue I wanted, or even the dresses I wanted to wear, I didn't let it bring me down. I only wish my husband will see that we are paying for all this, and it wasn't fair for MIL or FIL to have control over everything.

Now, things have gotten from bad to holy-bat-<i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i> madness living with MIL. MIL throws the loudest tantrums. She yells at the top of her lungs at me for the littlest things. Mind you, I cook dinner for husband, MIL, FIL, and BIL. I vacuum and mop the floors weekly, and I am on top of all the chores. For example, I was in the shower the other day, when I came out of the washroom, MIL was screaming, 'Why didn't you hear me call for you? I expect you to come every single time I call! Why are you such a filthy person? Your pillow sheet reeks, wash it this instant!' I told her they have already been changed a few days ago, and she yells, 'You think a man wants a stinky woman like you? He will leave you for a woman who smells like flowers where you reeks of garbage!' Comments like that are thrown over a 50 times a day. It has caused me a lot of stress. She will be against my nursing career. Her and FIL will gang up on me and say husband and I are destined for divorce. Nursing requires me to work nights as well, and they told me my husband will cheat on me because I am giving him ample opportunity to. Even the stress gets too much, I go home. I usually visit my parents over the weekends as I am their only daughter living here. My sister works out of town. MIL will ask why my husband seems to look paler and yell at me saying she thinks my parents poisoned their poor son. Accusations are so ridiculous, it some times has me thinking MIL is out of her mind. It's putting a lot of strain on our relationship, as my husband becomes the middle person. When my husband defends me when MIL bashes me nonstop when I am at work, MIL becomes more furious and asks him why he is always taking my side. She once told me my husband will never choose me over her because her blood runs through his, and that she is real family and I am not. I hope to move out sooner, and see less of her...



I honestly don't know where to start with my mother in law...she has said some nasty things about me and my daughter that I had before meeting her son (she still has not met me in her life), she has stalked my Facebook so bad that she made false accusations about me and made the rest of his family believe them about me. So when they put us in a group text message, I will get messages from everyone of his family harassing me. Recently, I been getting messages from some of his family gripping at me for not trying to interact with their family and they are very welcoming people! Very welcoming people?! Really? So calling me trailer trash whore, a druggie, a party whore, threaten to call CPS on me and etc. was just joking around to make me feel part of the family?

My mil likes to talk about what a failure my husband was at school in front of our two kids, and how 'clever' her 3 other children were including the golden child sil who she talks about all of the time. She will spend as little time at our house as possible, talking about sil and her 'brilliant' children the whole time. If I try to talk to my fil - a really nice guy - she says 'oh I used to pretend to like my fil too', or 'oh she doesn't want to hear about that.' She talks over everyone and never listens just reloads ready to go herself. She recently tried to ride over one of my plans for our family to facilitate her golden sil, but when I challenged it she went ahead and turned up at our house anyway. I asked her not to tell anyone about my miscarriage - she told everyone. If I tell the sil something she immediately tells the mother and visa versa - my husband says that's just women, they gossip, but we never hear a thing about sil's ptivate life. I am so miserable, I thought when you married it was your man's role to put his wife first but he says that I have made it so that he is uncomfortable seeing his family as though it is somehow my fault - is it?

My Parents In Laws keep saying that in the morning if my baby boy doesn't see them. He will miss them too much. And then they keep teaching my son to say &quot; Daddy&quot;. That's so annoying me. And too many things. I just hate it. Everyday. I just so stress out with them.

i have been married to my hubby for about 1 year... and my respected MIL,, initially she pretends to care me a lot..but as the time passsed.. she becomes insecure of our relationship.before she used my father in law in order to bad mouth me,,but now she use her daughter against me...rather talking face to face...even if i ask her a simple question,,she turns that into a miswrable conversation to her daughter..One of my drawback is i am having aggressive behaviour..Now she is using this image of me by badmouthing to everyone...i am helpless

Well my story is a nightmare that ends sadly. I met my future husband back in 2000, I wasn't looking for anyone was just in a chat room in yahoo and he happened to DM me. We chatted for a while and he ended up calling me. I lived in Indiana and he lived here in Kentucky. After a month we decided to meet in person. Long story short I ended up pregnant and decided to move to Kentucky to be with him. Even longer story short after a couple of months and me nudging him (which was a mistake) he finally let me meet his mother, reluctantly. We went to her house and as soon as we got in I had to use the restroom (pregnant woman lol) and he stayed in the living room and talked to his mother. I caught the butt end of the conversation as i was leaving the restroom and the 2 things I heard come from her mouth was ''Is it yours?&quot; I thought .. omg no she didn't this woman hadn't even talked to me yet!.. second thing was ''First thing you need to do is get her into church''.. I mean really?!.. I came in to where they were sitting and I swear this woman drilled me like a drill Sargent, asking me everything under the sun! we didn't stay long.. 30 minutes tops.. after we got out into the car, I didn't mention what i had heard, he didn't give me a chance to say anything.. he said ''Do you see why I didn't want to come here?, Do you see why I didn't want to tell her''. I was quiet for the rest of the 30 min drive home. And it's pretty much been a nightmare after that. Now let me give you a little bit of a insight to how i am. Im not a perfect goodie too-shoes kind of girl. First of all I come from a family of 8 kids, im number 6. Im the type of person that is very quiet, sort of shy until i get to know you.. then im loud mouthed and I do have a vocab that would probably make satan blush.. just saying. Im hard headed and I can be basically difficult sometimes, but let me just say this.. I havent been around my husbands mother enough to piss her off or what have you.. but she sure the hell had it in for me.. let me explain. See while my husband was alive, for at least 12 years of our marriage, he wasn't what you would call ''faithful''. And my gut would always let me know when something was up.. my gut was NEVER wrong. This ofcourse led to arguments and fighting.. cause i wasn't bout to put up with that bs.. so anyway everytime I would catch him doing something he shouldn't, he would run and tell his mother, right after i caught him (he'd call her or what have you) telling a whole heap of fairy tails that I was basically mean and hateful to him ect ect ect.. you get the picture. Now don't get me wrong we had good times too.. basically this woman, because he was her only son took his side..never asked me what was going on, never said anything to me..oh but she sure did put him up to some evil <i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i> to do to me. Like his first marriage, she found his lawyer for him..told him everything he needed to do to be underhanded to me. Got together with his ex wife, (who she invited to my husband's memorial after I emailed the b*tch and told her not to show up) and basically concocted a story and called CPS and told them that I abused his adopted daughter and tried to get my kids taken away. They also got his adopted daughter..who was maybe 10 at the time to make up a story that i ''twisted her arm'' ok anyone that knows me would know if i was gonna hit a kid, they'd be bent over my knee..just saying...well CPS came to talk to me, but when you have a child that sits there and tells your other children while she's over your house ''my daddy said when im over here that i can do what i want and nobody is going to do anything about it'' CPS isn't exactly going to take you seriously, not to mention there was no foundation for it..they spoke to all my kids and they told cps exactly how his daughter was while over at our house. There were so many instances of his mother butting into our relationship over the past 14 years I cannot count them all. Oh and she liked to ''give advice'' to my kids, like what she said to all 4 of my children while we were at his nephews wedding. Telling them all about his nephews new wife, how her family were well to do and that if they grew up and decided to get married that they needed to marry ''someone with money''.. ok from that statement I knew exactly what this woman cared about.. and who in the hell tells little kids this crap?!.. well obviously she does. I made sure once we got to the car, to let our children know that you don't marry someone for their money, you marry them because you love them and want to make a life with them. I think there was a hidden message from her in there for me ..but anyway.. like i said i had to put up with alot of bs from this woman for years.. to shorten this story in the last couple years of my husbands life, we had split up for about almost 2 years. (long story, swear i could write a book!) but decided to get back together in 2012. He was a very different person after I had moved back home and did a total turn around and our marriage was so much better. Even though things had happened his mother, i guess you would say, tried to be ''nice'' like adding me on facebook and would relay messages to me to give to my husband when she couldn't get ahold of him. I basically tried to let bygones be bygones not only for my husband but too that his sister was dying from cancer and didn't want friction when we had family gatherings. We had a family gathering in January for Christmas since his sister was sick and in the hospital. I could tell from the rest of his family that i wasn't welcomed there, my husbands mother tried to play nice, but his niece was extremely cold to me, to the point I walked away while she was talking to my husband... wasn't a comfortable situation for me. But it was once a year so i made the best of it. Let me also mention that since my husband was confiding in his mother all our problems to make himself look good NONE of his family had anything to do with our children (we have 2 children together a girl and a boy) No cards or phone calls for their birthdays, never went to their plays at school.. NOTHING.. I kept asking my husband why they never called or anything on the kids' birthdays ect.. and his response was ''I dunno''.. they would have nothing to do with our children because of their one sided opinion of me based on lies he told them. (I wasn't allowed to have his mother's phone number btw) Which is sad for my kids.. my children know nothing of these people..not because of me keeping them from their grandparent ect, but because THEY hated me they had nothing to do with the kids. smdh. Anyway months later the unthinkable happened. My husband was a courier for a medical company and drove blood samples ect to be tested from Lexington ky to Cincinnati Ohio, he was almost to Cincinnati and started having really bad chest pains.. long story short he went to the hospital and they couldn't find anything. He ended up coming home. And even though he was having chest pains again, being a stubborn red head that he was, I couldn't convince him to go back to the hospital that night. He died at 1:18 am. Was the absolute worst night of my life. As I said before i tried to let bygones be bygones and even though his adopted daughter and I didn't get along she was the first person I called to let her know that her father was at the hospital, second person was his mother. I got very little time alone with my husband after he died because someone was constantly interrupting it with papers to sign.. wanting me to donate his organs ect. but his daughter got time alone with him, because I asked her if she wanted it and we all left the room and let her say her goodbyes. his mother showed up later. anyway next day and a few days after that his mother played her ''nice'' role..basically pulling out her check book to pay for my husbands cremation..which she got paid back in full after I got his bank account and things in order. she did the same thing at for our wedding, basically taking over everything.. but that's another story. she called me on the phone every other day and we would discuss things that would happened and my husbands sister who was in the hospital very sick. (she ended up dying 12 days after my husband) ect ect. I thought things were good.. oh she played a very convincing role to be sure. She called me one day about something and then just happened to throw into the conversation about my husbands ex wife wanting her and her family to go to the memorial. I basically tried to pled my case, to no avail. I ended up calling her later leaving a voicemail and emailing her to make sure she got the message and explain to her in a nice way that this woman had been married 4 times after she was married to my husband and everything she did to me and my children I wouldn't feel comfortable with her being there and that i was emailing his ex and let her know that she wasn't welcomed. his mother never called back so i called her again, and basically got the song and dance of ''you need to be forgiving'' and ''that was the past'' blah blah blah.. and not in a nice was either..she was basically giving me an ultimatum. and kept telling me ''oh you'll never even see her, she'll be in the back'' ect ect.. that was a bold faced lie.. his ex and my mother in law were standing outside talking at my sister in laws funeral. once they saw me come out they scattered like cockroaches.. I believe she told this woman to come to my husbands memorial anyway, cause the thing showed up.. and not only wasn't she ''out of sight'' but she pranced her sorry butt up to the front talking to my mother in law and stood there for at least 20 minutes to make sure i saw her, my mother in law also kept looking over at me... (mind you this woman never shed a tear at my husbands memorial..his own mother! smdh) and his ex sat in the middle of the church in eye sight of me.(oh and btw this chick, like i said has been married 4 times after she was married to my husband and still uses my husbands last name on facebook) the memorial thing, basic slap in the face.. oh and not only that my family couldn't make it to my husbands memorial because of the distance. His family spent the time after the memorial gathered around talking to my husbands ex.. exchanging phone numbers ect while the only time they spoke to me was to come up to me for 2 secs and tell me how sorry they was before the memorial. Noone from his immediate family had anything to do with me afterwards.. I was pretty upset and pissed and after everyone went downstairs of the church to eat i sat up in the sanctuary, I never spoke to anyone of them after that, never went downstairs and left early.. no goodbyes..nothing.. they didn't deserve it. I never spoke to them again. His sister and niece tried to talk to my children and get them to go to his adopted daughters baby shower.. wasn't going to happen. I changed my number and messaged them on fb and told them to leave me and my children alone. Best thing I ever did. When people act like this towards you and your children, best thing to do is to cut them off. My life is stress free not having to deal with them anymore. Don't get me wrong, my husband was a blessing in the last couple years of his life, and I wish with all my heart that our entire marriage was that way (it probably would have been if his mother stayed out of it!) and I wish everyday that he was still with us, but I thank God everyday that I am no longer related to those ignorant, self centered, stuck up people!

Open Letter To My FIL

Oh B., you really just make it too easy. You see, your constant ignoring and treating my husband and kids poorly is only going to make it worse for you in the long run. You think you are punishing ME by ignoring THEM, when in reality you only make it easier for me to justify the eventual cut-off that is right around the corner. When will you realize that I don't want your money, and I don't want your land? What I wanted was something you could never give: your love. You withheld that from day one, first from me, then from the kids, and finally from my husband.

You have finally beaten me down to the point where I just want to get my kids, my husband, and myself as far away from you as possible, and to not look back. That is where this is heading, you do realize that, right? You have hurt us all for long enough, and now that you have foolishly been so blatant about taking it out on my kids and my husband (when most likely your real hatred is saved mostly for me), you have sealed your own fate. You will no longer have grandchildren who give you a second thought.

You've done a pretty good job of alienating your son as well.

One day, and Lord forgive me for saying that I hope it is not too far in the future, you will be gone. As I said, I don't want a freaking thing from you - but I do think the right thing to do would be to provide something for your grandchildren upon your eventual demise.

You can only sit atop your pile of gold for so long. You cannot take it with you, Old Man. Your privileged daughter doesn't need it, and your ignorant, drunken, racist, womanizing youngest son doesn't deserve it. These are your only grandchildren (well, until Baby Boy finally rolls the roulette wheel one too many times and knocks someone up). They deserve at least something from you....since clearly you refuse to make that something be LOVE. The lease you can do is provide a college education for them. I wonder if you've even considered them in your will....or have you already ensured that Baby Boy gets it all?

It matters not, to be honest. I didn't fight for the money my step-father swindled me out of from my mother's estate, and I won't go to battle for your money, either. You see, at the end of the day, it's blood money one way or the other. You cannot buy your grandchildren's love. If you manage to do the right thing and leave them something, trust me they will only think about it as money for college....because you have left them very few good memories of YOU that will be attached to that money.

How sad, isn't it? You've pushed and you've pushed, and you are now going to reap what you have sown.

I came here for some very specific reasons. Yes, I was hoping it would mean my kids would enjoy some time with their grandparents...but since that clearly isn't working, I now will focus on the other reasons I came. Financial reasons that will ultimately save me from certain financial traps I was once in, thanks to certain sweet benefits I can now utilize.

One day, those traps will be far behind me, and so will you be. I love my husband, and truly hope he opens his eyes a little more to what you have continued to do to him, his wife, and his children....and one day, it will be US who win out in the end.

Does it bother you that we could care less about your money? We could care less about your status (that is, of course, before you retired...and now, my friend, you are nothing without your job title but an angry, gout-ridden old man). We were hoping for something you simply never would understand: unconditional love and acceptance.

That's OK, B. We will give that to our kids ourselves...but if you think I will not tell my children how horrible you were, you are sadly mistaken. I want them to realize that their grandfather could give 2 $#!ts about anything except himself (and his drunken youngest son). I want them to realize what a disappointment you are. What a pathetic, small, ignorant man you are.

My father is way more of a grandfather to these kids...not that it would be hard to improve upon you. We have friends who are more of a family to us and our kids than you and your crew of ignoramuses have been. OK, I will give your wife the smallest bit of credit for showing SOME interest and caring in these kids - you know, periodically when it was convenient and for approximately 10 minutes per visit. But sure, I'll give her credit for those 10 minutes. The rest of you, however, get no such credit.

I hope you die a lonely, miserable man...one who realizes that his prodigy has moved far away from him (because that's the 5 year plan, my friend). I hope you realize how far you pushed your son away - a gentle man who loved you and idolized you...and now, all he feels is disconnect, disappointment, and sadness at the very thought of you.

If all of this makes you proud in any way, may karma find you one day and show you all the wasted time that could have been spent loving these beautiful children, your wonderful son, and your daughter-in-law - who only ever wanted to be loved by you.

It is rare to wish someone to leave this planet, but I find myself feeling that way about you. You have just hurt us all so much, that I can only imagine we'll ever feel any real semblance of peace only when you are finally gone. You took a family of wonderful people (us) who only wanted to love you, and made us apathetic and sad. Bravo, my friend, Bravo.

What my in-laws don't seem to understand is that the more they show their true colors with me, the worse it is going to be for them. As I noted before (I can't remember if it was in my original confession as well as in comments to others), we had to cut off my in-laws (for nearly 2 years) for them to finally get the picture that we mean business. We let them know we are not going to tolerate them treating me with disrespect, and we also are not going to tolerate them picking favorites amongst our children (it is very hurtful to the child who is *NOT* their favorite).

So, as some may remember, we are temporarily living with my in-laws (we'll be in our own place next week, though, and it's well over an hour-and-a-half drive away). Please understand that I AM totally grateful that we were able to land here (we moved here from another country to, in part, be closer to DH's family (we're discovering that was a bit of a mistake) along with financial reasons). I AM totally grateful they have fed and housed us these past several months while we became acclimated to this country and while DH has been looking for a job. I am NOT grateful, however, for the disrespect we've received since we got here.

So, here we are getting ready to move in a few days, and yes they are planning to help us. That's all well and good, and I appreciate the help. They seem to think, however, that laying a guilt trip on me is going to bring them good results. My MIL last night layed this huge guilt trip on me about the kids being so far away from her (these same kids that she barely spends time with, by the way...although I will give her credit that she spends more time with them than the others). I go into my bedroom every night after dinner so that my in-laws can spend time with the kids if they choose. Typically, one will be watching TV, another will retreat to his room (my jerk of a BIL), and the 3rd will putter around doing her own thing while my kids play with toys in the living room. I give them two good hours before I start coming out and getting the kids to pick up their toys and get ready for bed (and if someone deems they can be bothered to be speaking with the kids, I give them even longer). Usually, they barely get 5 words out of anyone that whole time.

My MIL has the nerve to try to make ME feel badly because we're moving out. After the way they've treated me since we got here, she has quite a nerve. We probably would have happily stayed for even a few more months if everyone wasn't so awful. They think it is hilarious to continue to leave the screen doors open for mosquitos (and other bugs) and snakes to just wander in whenever they like, even though we have some of the most deadly snakes on the planet living right in their very back yard (bush land), and even though I have asked nicely, then begged, then got angry for them to STOP doing that. They know I'm deathly afraid of snakes, and I swear to god if a snake got in this house and bit one of the children, there would have been hell to pay.

They also think it's hilarious that my ignorant BIL makes flippant comments about my 6 y.o. DD's disability (autism). I spoke to him a couple of times very politely about it, once even at the dinner table (I had no choice because he was making his rude comments at dinner, and I felt the only way to deal with that is to address it right there and then). I then finally got angry one day and screamed at him (for literally only about 2-3 minutes!) and my gosh you would have thought I chopped off a limb the way my FIL got on my case about it. He basically told me that even though my BIL said inappropriate things, I should have 'respected' him and not yelled at him. Well, honey, where I come from women are not afraid of their men, and I'll tell someone off if it is needed (again, I try to do it politely and calmly a few times first).

Anyway, it became a big thing, and BIL started purposely opening doors in the house to irritate me (because he knows how I am afraid of the snakes and bugs here). Well, he's not the only one who does that. All 3 of them leave doors open regularly...STILL...even though both my DH and I have asked/begged/gotten upset about it. I told them it puts the kids at risk, not just me, and they still don't care.

Well, guess what? Because this keeps happening (literally just happened...again), and because of the attitudes I'm still getting, they'll realize that irritating me is a bad choice. We may still be within driving distance, but don't look to me to be making that drive very often. Trust me, if I don't harrass my DH, he would forget (or just never be bothered to) call/visit/buy gifts for his family. If I don't answer the phone, or don't pass a message along, he doesn't care. Irritating ME means these children will not be seeing their grandparents very often (they only saw them for about 4 weeks each summer when the in-laws would visit every July, and otherwise only about 1x/month on webcam). My DH is not going to want to spend a day off driving this whole distance by himself, and he knows I'm not going to be in a hurry to come visit. He knows he's welcome to bring the kids and come by himself, but I really don't see that happening very often...once a month MAYBE.

Without my support and prodding, my DH will be unlikely to call very often or visit, and if my MIL thinks she can just pop in whenever she likes, she has another thing coming. I know which days she's likely to visit, and I am happy to ensure we're busy and not at home.

Yes, I know it sounds petty, but I am done with allowing these people to disrespect me and the kids. To think they can ignore these kids when they've had every chance to play with them these past several months, and then think I'm going to roll over and accept that they have a strong need to suddenly spend time with them is crazy. It's not going to cut an ounce of mustard with me. They'll see the kids the 1x/month that DH might be willing to make the trip, and maybe (maybe) 1x/month when my MIL is in town for a couple of hours, and on Christmas and the kids' birthdays. That's all they're getting.

They've pushed us so hard that we're already making plans for another country change in 5-7 years. Moving on. We figure that gives the kids time to be with their grandparents while they are still little, and then we'll do some more world traveling when the kids are teens and at a good age to really enjoy seeing different world sites. If my in-laws don't irritate us too much, we'll let them go back to visiting for several weeks a year. I hope they are proud of themselves and with what their poor behaviors have gotten them. I once cared about what they thought. I once wanted them to love me. I gave up years ago when I realized that they will never love me, and that they are incapable of unconditional love and acceptance. Time to start preparing for greener pastures. Nice that we gave up everything to move here, eh?

I have been dating my boyfriend for over two years, known him for 5 years and for all purposes we are partners. We live 16 hours drive from my family and 2 hours from his. I love him with all my heart and he loves me. His family is of a different culture, religion and race which seems to matter to them but not us.
When I first met the family, after a year of dating, they already hated me. The grandfather had instilled a sense of hatred and racism in all of them. He would tell them to wash themselves if they touched me.
This weekend was the worst. His mother told me to be with my own &quot;kind&quot;. She told me that they will never accept me or any children we have together. She spewed out ignorance that all around could see. She even took the car keys out of the ignition while i was driving to hit and harass me when I was trying to leave a bad situation.
My partner was so upset he drank until he was sick. I had to take away the alcohol, bath him to hydrate him and get his best friend to calm him down because he wouldn't stop crying.
I don't know what to do. I am there for him but I feel a distance in is heart. His mother has hurt him so much. He still wants to marry me and have kids with me. I think he realizes for that to happen, his family may not be able to be a part in our lives due to their own wishes and not ours. I sacrificed my pride to try and make things work with his family and I can't do that any more. I have chosen to keep them at a distance.
I hope after all this my partner still wishes to have a life we planned together. I pray whatever happens, that we will be happy again without this dark cloud of in-laws hanging over us.

My husband and I are staying with his mother until we get our own place. She complains about everything. She always tells me what in doing wrong, actually what she thinks I'm doing wrong. My husband works long hours so I'm there with her all day. I wanted a job so bad, but it's hard to apply when you don't know anyone around there and MIL said she doesn't want to babysit our one year old. When I do get hired somewhere and find a sitter, she makes comments like;&quot; You just want that higher paying job so you can pay the babysitter AND have extra money in your pocket!&quot; I don't think she realizes that it's the idea of having a job. She gives me looks when I speak. Criticizes my driving,(she doesn't have a license or a car because of DUI's) so she has to rely on me to take her places. She tells me how SHE does laundry and dishes and that's how she wants me to do it. Certain settings on the washer only. I can put dish soap on the sponge but not the dish clothe. She said I bring too much food in the house. I told her I buy for all of us. She said she doesn't easy what we eat, but whenever I make dinner, she eats it. I'd I don't offer her something she gets offended. But I cook and clean it up. Her RULES are always changing. She treats me totally different when her son is not around. I told him some things the other day and I was crying. He said something to get and she stopped talking to me. She still has her demands, but otherwise she stays clear of me. I can feel her watching my every move tho. I want to scream. She tries to tell me how to raise my daughter, tells at her, tries to discipline her. I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't. She always has something negative to say to me. I don't know how long I can handle living there. I escape to my parents house sometimes. They live over an hour away. There's so much more I could say, in just going to take a break now. Ahh.

My husband is from another country, and I can understand his native language but only speak a few words. I am a full time student and a mom to a 1 year old. We share an apartment with his older single brother who looks down on me and despises me. He insists to be my husband's #1 relationship and does not allow me to join in on family conversations. He is verbally abusive to me. My mother in law came to stay with us for 2 months. They spoke about me often in their language when I was in the room in a horrible way. She not only condoned his behavior, but she turned into a wild hyena and screamed at me to get out of my own home. My husband backed her up. I came back but I don't know what to do.

i left my husband because of my mother in law!

i'm almost four months pregnant and have left my in laws home and moved back in with my parents. i could not stand my mother in law anymore. she made my life hell. she gave me tremendous stress since i have been pregnant, and its been affecting my health.

and to make matters worse, my husband does not stand up for me. he does not understand what i went through. he and his mother have an emotional incest type relationship, so naturally i cannot win with her.

i have asked my husband to rent a place for us, but he claims he can do this only after three months or so. he is not happy that i'm away. i dont know what step he is going to take now regarding our marriage. i'm ready to divorce him if he doesnt change.

i'm really heart broken and lost and angry. i dont know what to do anymore. i'm tired of his family dictating my life, and will dictate my child too if i live with them.

My mother in laws dog attacked my 18 month old daughter. My husband and I asked her to cage the dog or put it away. She refused so we said we don't feel comfortable having our daughter near the dog so the inlaws could visit our daughter anywhere away from the dog. She then started a hate campaign on Facebook against my husband and I. She started harassing us at work so we contacted the police and had them advise her to stop. She retaliated by calling CAS and making a false claim. They came over and said we have a lovely home and a beautiful daughter. We have not talked to the inlays since. They have not seen my daughter since March 2013 the night the dig attacked my daughter.

I met my bf 2 years ago. We were set up on a blind date. I was 38, he was 47. After a short time, we fell in love and I moved in with him. At the time, his brother and SIL lived with him, but moved out a couple months later to their own apartment. We were alone for 6 months when his mother came back to live with him (when I met him, she was living with her daughter 3 hours north of us). I didn't fully understand their family situation at first, but his mother has (for the most part) always lived with my bf or her daughter. They are definitely a family that is very much involved in each others' business. Before she moved back in with him (and me), she came to visit to meet me. I was making dinner for everyone, and MIL comments &quot;Well aren't you a little Suzy homemaker&quot;. I smiled and just commented back how much I enjoy cooking for others. I didn't know her at all, so I didn't know to pick up on the condescending tone that was obviously there. Shortly after she moved in, comments started. I'll list them so it's easier to read:

1. She and I would go to the laundromat together, and she would tell me how SHE did his laundry...not drying his pajama bottoms because they'll shrink, adding the laundry soap after the water has begun running into the front loader to prevent discoloration on the clothes etc.
2. She will not let me wash dishes at night after dinner. I tried and she would say &quot;it'll give me something to do tomorrow.&quot; I explained that I don't mind and I like to take part, too. I was by the sink getting ready to do them, when she annoyingly sighed after this exchange and then bf said to me &quot;Let mom do them&quot;. I left the room crying and very frustrated.
3. We leave the house very early - before 6am. He sometimes forgets to bring things with him (like we all do)...a snack, beverage, whatever so she told me that it would be helpful if I reminded him because he forgets things. She also told me that it would probably be best to make our lunches the night before so that I'm not running late in the morning.
4. One hot summer day, he and I got home and she didn't have any windows open. We didn't have an A/C at the time. She commented that there wasn't a breeze anyway. I opened a window anyway, and sure enough there was enough of a breeze to help the hot staleness. She didn't talk to me for several days after that. When we did get an A/C, we had it on one night and I woke up and it was freezing so I turned it off. She commented the next morning to bf about how hot she got because I turned it off. This past summer, we got home and it was 80 in the house and she didn't have the A/C on, so I turned it on and she got annoyed. In the colder days, it's also a battle to use the heater. We live in a small house and have a propane wall unit that doesn't have a thermostat so we have to turn it on when it gets chilly. She never wants it on and it will be low 60's in the house! Soooo....she wants it warm in the summer and cold in the winter?? I feel like it's more a matter of control than it is the temperature.
5. Our dog is sick right now with mammary cancer. Her tumor is bleeding as we try to aggressively treat it naturally so we have to keep it covered. She will chew the bandage off if given the opportunity so we bought the cone to use on her. I can tell that MIL doesn't want to use it on the dog because every time we would talk about it before I bought it, she wouldn't say a word. Granted, I hate them too, but this is an extreme situation and I keep saying that we can't be held hostage in the house because the dog can't be left alone. So, we have the cone and bf and I have put it on her a couple times to get her used to it. Last night, we had the dog in our room with the cone on and I had to go into the living room for something and I told MIL &quot;Lady's doing well with the cone on. She's relaxing and even eating some treats.&quot; I was trying to reassure her. She said nothing to me. When I was walking away she makes a noise &quot;Hmmmm.&quot; That's it.
6. MIL wants to do everything. Take care of the house, go grocery shopping. I can't even look in a cupboard for something without her asking &quot;What are you looking for?&quot; Because she wants to tell me where it is. When I answer, she'll get up to come get it and I'll say &quot;That's not necessary, I can get it.&quot; I feel like she's more controlling than truly wanting to help. We bought a new vacuum cleaner and she comments to bf and me at dinner &quot;Now it'll be easier for Colleen to clean your bedroom with the new vacuum.&quot; As if that's the only room I need to be concerned about because she'll take care of the rest.

She's also a very moody person. We'll get home some nights and she's just miserable. I'm a much more optimistic, positive person and her energy drags me right down and I immediately get bummed out and feel kinda crappy. I have talked to bf about it, but there's not a whole lot that can be done. I've researched a ton online, and I'm trying to make comments and stand up for myself when a situation arrives. It's not easy for me because I dislike confrontation and will often put my own needs aside to maintain peace, but I'm trying to change that.

I feel like MIL lived in the house before I ever did, so it's &quot;her&quot; house and will never be mine. We are going to buy a new house in about 3-4 years, but I'm already stressing about having to stand up to her about how I want things done / decorated. I'm not sure I'll ever truly be the woman of the house. She buys a lot of things for the house and makes comments making me believe that she does so, so she can dictate how they are used. She bought a grill, and bought a pan to go on the grill for foods that might slip through the grate (or so I thought). I was grilling hamburgers and didn't want to use the pan. She commented &quot;That's what we bought it for. We shouldn't have bought it if you weren't going to use it.&quot; I like to have food directly on the grill dammit! I can understand using the pan for hotdogs etc. Then she also made comments about how dirty the grill is getting...insinuating that by not using the pan I'm letting drippings get all over the inside. Isn't that what's supposed to happen with a grill??

Okay, I'll stop for now. Breathe.....

Good GOD help me find love and patience for this evil vile woman and please help her be less crazy and childish. Ok so I was in the bathroom when I heard my phone ring but I finish my business. Before I am done washing my hands this crazed obsessive woman texts me. I read it, it says, &quot; I got my patches and from now on when you guys call I won't pick up. So I text her that my husband is still at the gym and I was in the bathroom when she called, I'm sorry I could not make it in time to the phone but I am texting her back now. (Please kindly correct me if my handling of this was wrong and offer kind suggestions but anyway ladies.) She texts my phone probably thinking that my husband was texting her, she says, &quot;Your wife is so nasty, my message was for you.&quot; I read it and my mind flares up in anger and I compose myself to be able to speak to her calmly without exploding. I call her and calmly tell her like it is (I am so done with her self appointed high horse, I refuse to grovel and let her walk all over me). I said, &quot;Mrs. Adams (real names will not be used just in case she reads confessions to try to find ways to be the worst mother in law possible) I was not trying to be nasty but was simply stating the truth and also, my husband is still at the gym and I am home by myself right now. Then this crazy woman goes to say, &quot;You know what?! That message wasn't for you!&quot; Still keeping calm I respond repressing my anger and utter disbelief that a grown 50 something year old woman could be so petty, &quot; But it's my phone, you called my phone and texted my phone.&quot; Then she angrily says, &quot; You know what?!&quot;.....*short pause* She then abruptly hangs up on me instead of trying to talk things out calmly like adults. My husband and I have been married for 2 and 1/2 years known each other in total for about 5 years and slowly her crazy is starting to show and day by day it gets WORSE not better. She is extremely petty and childish. She never admits that she is wrong and whatever my husband or I do for her she is not appreciative of and sometimes forgets it all together. She over exaggerates and constantly takes things ANYONE says the wrong way. She is a woman that if she doesn't like someone she wants everyone in her circle to hate them too. Dear God I pray and pray and pray hoping you will answer. We need help......help me find patience and love for this crazy woman.

Hi there. I don't even know where to begin. I guess at the beginning? I've been with my husband for over 10 years and we have two children together. My in-laws took an instant dislike to me, even before they met me. We've done various stages of cut-off with them over the years, which have always been successful in getting them to behave better. We used to live much further away from them, so back then it was easy to just not pick up the phone...

We made the sorry mistake of moving in temporarily with them when we moved to their country (yes, you read that right). Things had been somewhat on the improve when we made this plan....and so was the economy here. We seemed to arrive as the economy tanked (we had been planning this for 2 years, sold our house and gave away/threw out/sold 99% of our possessions before we moved). What we also did not realize is that my BIL would be living here. We (incorrectly) assumed that since he's away at college, he would...you know....stay there (until the xmas break). We didn't realize that because BIL needs his butt wiped every other weekend by his mummy and daddy, it would mean we would then be 7 people living under one roof.

Seven people under one roof might not be so bad if 2 of those people weren't ignorant. My BIL and his daddy are good ol' boy drinking buddies who feel BIL should never be spoken to for his rude behaviors (I guess I missed the memo that BIL's poo doesn't stink, that he's god's gift to the world and that he should be encouraged and clapped on the back for his cruel and rude behaviors).

Well, you can see the writing on the wall here. I finally had enough of BIL's ignorant behavior, and I finally snapped and told him I didn't appreciate it, didn't want to hear his mouth, etc. Well, daddy dearest came to baby boo-boo's rescue and said that he's taking a side, and that &quot;OBVIOUSLY&quot; (his stressed word, which he used twice for emphasis) he's going to take BIL's side (without even knowing any of the facts leading up to this because, and I know this sounds strange, but I don't go running and whining to my MIL and FIL every time BIL steps out of line (mainly because I'd be running to them constantly lol...and also because I believe 2 people can sort out their own differences - and also because I knew my side would never be respected anyway.)

Well, you can imagine it's made things incredibly tense here in this house. Hubby is still desperately looking for work an hour away from this one-horse town, but as I mentioned the economy has tanked and unemployment is high, so he's competing with lots of other people out there looking for work.

Now we're stuck in a very uncomfortable position, and I've finally lost my ability to suffer in silence, so we're all at a bit of an impasse. I've tried just hiding in my room and not speaking to anyone, but they come bother me in here wanting to hash it out again, and frankly I just want everyone to leave me alone and just let us try to move on in peace (if the darned phone would hurry up and ring with a job offer).

My husband is a very gentle soul. He has spoken in my defense, but his opinion is never respected around here...little baby boo-boo is the only one who gets anyone to listen to him, and naturally they're too busy wiping his butt and clapping him on the back to realize they've created a monster who, at 30 years old, should by now be a decent human being who is capable of treating people decently. BIL's been cheered on by his heavy-drinking father (FIL) because he's also a fan of his drink, he's a womanizer, and an athletic guy (everything that my husband is NOT).

I'm at my wits end, nearly ready to find some kind of crisis center so the kids and I don't have to deal with the crud that goes on in this house...but that would really hurt my husband, and so I've held off on that option. We're exploring every option for housing (even house sitting), but nothing has yet panned out (at least, nothing we can afford without a job). My husband does have unemployment money coming in (this country actually takes care of its unemployed folk to some degree), but it is not enough to pay for an apartment. There is housing and rent assistance, but the gears grind slowly on that front, and we're likely to be another several weeks waiting for that to work out (but yes, we are applying for it, especially now that tensions have risen so high).

I'm just - lost. I'm in a strange country living under the roof of people who never really liked me in the first place, and tensions are very high in our home. I'm having some trouble adapting 100% to the climate and social differences as it is, without their crud adding on to it. Hindsight being 20/20, we would have made other choices in our move if we had known the BIL was going to be here so much...but, here we are.

Just needed a safe place to vent. Clearly, it's not safe to vent here in this house (except to my poor, long-suffering husband, whose heart is breaking over all of this)

DOn'et

The slashes error has been fixed in the website. Cheers! #Developer_Team

Doesn't it ?

Don't Move!

Please don\'t beat me.

That's A Testing Confesse's, Share Your Storie's !

I been with my husband for 3 years married, my mother in-law lives in hawaii and comes to visit in illinois were me and my husband live. when she comes to visit she stays in her own apartment building in which she owns. but now she wants to stay in my house when she comes to visit ..... which is for 3 weeks to 6 months. i already dont get along with her and i don\\\'t want her to stay in my house. im fighting with my husband bc my husband doesnt see a problem with his mother staying with us when she comes to visit. its my house and i don\\\'t feel comfortable with her staying in my house for weeks . i already dont get along with her and im extremly stressed out , im crying every night please help me... my husband says he will divorce me if i dont let his mother stay with us when she visits, i dont want her in same house as me as she is controlling, and makes me cry, . please help me what do i do?

xzczxc

So my husband and I got married young for our generation. I am from another country, another culture. My husband is white Italian, I am Indian from the Carribean. We dated a year and a half and he respected me enough knowing back then I was religious and wanted to wait for marriage. He waited until our wedding night. However, rewind to when we got engaged. His mother told him to live with me first and test the waters sexually to see if he likes it before commiting to me. She went as far as going to my church and talking to our NEW Pastor at the time. Lied at said at the age of 20 I was drinking and partying with my friend\\\'s. Which was a lie. I entered competitions for preaching and singing since age 12 to get scholarships to go to college. I could have gotten a full scholarship, just needed the Pastor to sign and recommend me...instead through her talking to him, he wouldn\\\'t do it and I basically lost my scholarships and all the hard work I put into it. She didn\\\'t care, all she cared about was breaking up her son and I.
We went through with our marriage at the age of 21 and he was 20. For his age, he was extremely mature and hard working, for our generation to find someone like that is a gift.
After we got married, I got pregnant 6 months later and was so sick I had to be hospitalized numerous times. We ended up having to move in with my in laws since I couldn\\\'t work and almost lost my life in the process. My mother in law said my pregnancy was to trap her son and said the baby was a huge mistake. The entire pregnancy while I was sick, she was encouraging her son to cheat. She said to him \\\'\\\'just because you are on a diet doesn\\\'t mean you can\\\'t sample what\\\'s on the menu\\\&quot;. Her way of saying just because you are married doesn\\\'t mean you can\\\'t cheat.
Fast forward 5years of marriage, 2 babies (their only grandbabies since my sister in law doesn\\\'t want kids). Five years of continuous strife with them, stalking, even at times his mother pushed me. Lies, false accusations. We ended up staying with them over the summer time until we found a bigger apt and they started teaching our 3year old to call my MIL \\\&quot;white grandma\\\&quot; and my mother \\\&quot;brown grandma\\\&quot; She and another family member told my child, at my own bday party, \\\&quot;mommy has a green face\\\&quot; \\\&quot;mommy doesn\\\'t love you\\\&quot; \\\'\\\'brown grand doesn\\\'t love you\\\&quot; \\\&quot;white grandma doesn\\\'t want baby brother because he is brown like mommy\\\&quot;...amongst other very nasty things. I got into a huge arguement with them and we ended up moving out to stay at my moms, they believe that the last 6 weeks that my husband and I are getting a divorce. They have even bribed him with money, bought stuff for his \\\'\\\'apt\\\'\\\', written numerous letters and texts as to why I shouldn\\\'t have my children and why THEY should have custody and I should not have my children in my life. His mother even made a police report with false information about me. They are encouraging my husband to \\\'\\\'live it up\\\'\\\' with a girl from his culture.
At this point, I am fed up with them and I could care less if they even see us ever again. They will be in for a rude awakening when they find out we are still happily married. My husband and I are best friends and we adore our children! They are happy healthy kids who mean the world!

Hi Ladies! We\'re Baaaaccckkkkkk! Or Almost Back:) Motherinlawhell.com was launched back in 2001 as the go-to place where women from around the world came to share their mother-in-law stories , get and give advice and so forth. Years later, we rebranded as the daughter-in-law society, http://www.dilsociety.com. Fast forward to 2015 , and we are launching the mother-in-law APP for iphone and Droid that will allow you to scream\&quot;type\&quot; away your mother-in-law frustration even if you are sitting right in front of you. Pretty cool right? Your Daughter-in-law sisterhood will be virtually there for you at any given moment. Register for the site here and you will be notified when the app is launched:)

My mother in law is the most selfish, manipulative piece of work I\'ve ever met. She does not want any of her 4 kids to be married. She is pissed whenever they get married. She just wants them all to herself forever. She does not like me because I am a different religion than her. Even though they are similar and both christian. She hangs up the phone on my husband if he is not telling her everything she wants to hear or if she doesn\'t get her way. She didn\'t show up to our son\'s birthday party because she was mad at us. She threatened not to come to our wedding because it was in my church. Also, when she did show up she wore black. She told the rest of the family how often my husband and I have sex (which my husband had told her). We live in a small town so I was furious when this got back to me at work. A coworker knew how often we do that. I am sick of my husband not nipping this in the bud. She drives him nuts also, he is just so afraid of her. He is afraid to come to church with me because he said he\'s afraid someone in town will tell her they saw him there with me. We don\'t ask her to babysit anymore cuz she hangs it over our head. When I was pregnant she wouldn\'t say hello back to my husband because we were not doctoring at the clinic that she wanted us to.

My name is Donna. My boyfriend (Derek) and I have a 1 year old daughter. She was unplanned. He\'s 25 and i\'m 29. Him and I both are living with my parents because we both have low income jobs. He works full time making $10/hour, I work full time making $14/hour.

My boyfriend and I are not married. Probably because of his mother. His mother is very annoying to me. Her name is Kimberly.

Kimberly does not have a good marriage with her husband (Rick). Her husband drinks and her other son (Brendan) smokes weed. Brendan is 19 years old and he gets spoiled by his parents. He doesn\'t have a job and still depends on his mom to take care of him.

When Derek told his parents that I\'m pregnant and that we needed their support, his mother was like \&quot;you\'re on your own.\&quot; Basically, his parents did not want to help him find a better job or help him go back to school or help him out in any way. And Derek has a low income job, he cannot support his me and my daughter on his own. And so i have no choice but to work full time and put my daughter into daycare.

When I gave birth to my daughter, I had this bad feeling about Kimberly. My motherly instincts tells me not to trust this lady. I barely knew this lady. And Kimberly just got all excited and was impatient about bringing my daughter back to her house. And I told my boyfriend that I was not ready for that. He did not defend me. He was only thinking about his mother\'s wants. He did not realize how uncomfortable that would make me feel. And I hated him for that. And i hated his mother for that as well. She did not think twice before taking my daughter away from me, and she was only 1 month old and I was breastfeeding.

Kimberly tried to make up excuses to get me to let her have the baby at her house. But I was uncomfortable about it. Especially the fact that my boyfriend and I are struggling financially to support our own daughter and his parents do not want to help him out. And I had to financially support my own kid more than my boyfriend because i make more and i work full time. I wish i didn\'t had to work so that I can be with my daughter more. I did not want my daughter to be raised by Kimberly. I was uncomfortable about that.

Derek needs to stop being a mama\'s boy. And Kimberly needs to back off! it\'s not her kid although she thinks it is. Derek should have defend me against his mother.

I have a feeling that Kimberly only cares about herself and her grandchild. She doesn\'t care if me and Derek do not work out. She doesn\'t care if our relationship is unhappy. Kimberly recently told her son, \&quot;why do you stay with such a bitch!\&quot; all because she couldn\'t get what she wants which is doing whatever she wants with my daughter and taking advantage of the opportunity. I do not respect this woman who does not respect my wishes and does not respect my boundaries!

My boyfriend needs to stop being a <i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i><i class="fa fa-asterisk filtered"></i> or a whimp towards his mother. I see that his mother suffers from depression and is negative and puts her son down all the time. She\'s not emotionally supportive towards her son because she\'s not getting what she wants. Derek has problems confronting his mother and standing up to her. His mother threatens him that if she doesn\'t get what she wants which is to see my daughter whenever she wants, she would not give him his pain medicine for his back.

And I ask Derek, \&quot;Why do you continue putting up with your mom?\&quot; I don\'t understand.

Load More Confessions

Confess It — Don't Repress It.

daughters in law, don’t suffer in silence!